“What If…” 

                Brian took the strangling too far.

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Justin lounged on the bed while Brian got dressed to go to Babylon. He stared at the news article, seeing it but not really reading the words. When the body was found at the place where he worked it upset him a lot. He wanted to talk to Brian about it but he knew it wouldn’t do any good. Brian would just end up changing the topic or they would end up fucking. He just couldn’t get it out of his head. It could have been him discarded amongst the diner’s leftovers, unknown and unwanted by anyone. The thought made him sick to his stomach.

 

“Brian, that guy we did last night he could have been the killer. We didn’t know anything about him. He could have done anything to us.”

 

“That woulda been hot.” Brian climbed up on the bed planting his feet on either side of Justin’s hips. He nudged Justin with his foot and he rolled over looking up at him. “The first time you came here you didn’t know anything about me. I could have done anything to you.”

 

Justin smiled confidently “I was pretty sure you were going to fuck me.”

 

Brian kneeled down slowly and sensually. Staring at Justin he starts stroking his stiffening cock through his tight black jeans. “You came here not knowing what was going to happen. That was part of the thrill.” Brian leans over him rubbing him through his cargo pants. He murmured “It’s what made you hard. Your hard right now just thinking about it. The danger, the excitement, he whispers.

 

Justin growls on the brink of cuming “fuck me!”

 

Brian ran his lips along Justin’s torso making him pant. He placed an open mouth kiss on his neck. Brian lunged at Justin startling him a bit. Brian roughly grabs his throat and starts to squeeze.

 

“What if I started to strangle you?”

 

Justin didn’t know what to do. He’d never seen Brian this way before. He was starting to scare him. He tried to remain calm and make a joke. “I’d rather you choked me with your dick” he said nervously.

 

Brian hovered over his face. He whispered “you could be dead right now.”

 

Brian tongued Justin’s open mouth. Justin gasped for air he was having trouble breathing. He grabbed Brian’s thighs and squeezed but the pressure still remained on his throat. Justin couldn’t get enough air to fill his lungs. He knew he would pass out soon. Why was Brian doing this to him? One tear slid down his face. He managed one last word before the room went black.

 

“Brian.”

 

Justin’s hands slipped down Brian’s thighs and flopped on the bed. Brian looked at him and quickly released his throat. His neck was already starting to bruise. He checked to make sure Justin was still breathing. Brian ran to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. Brian cradled him in his arms and pored a little water on his face.

 

“Come on Sunny boy open your eyes. Let me see those baby blues of yours. You can do it baby.”

 

Justin gasped for breath and started coughing. Brian rubbed slow soothing circles down his back. When the coughing fit subsided he handed Justin the water bottle to drink. The cool water soothed his burning throat. Justin jerked away from his touch a flash of emotions played over his face fear, shock, anger and betrayal.

 

Justin backed away from Brian. “How could you do that to me?” His voice was almost a whisper. “You hurt me!”

 

“Justin” Brian took a step forward.

 

Justin retreated quickly grabbing up his shoes and a shirt that was on the floor. “Just stay away from me Brian, just don’t even touch me.”

 

“I didn’t mean for it to go that far. I was trying to teach you a lesson.”

 

Justin quickly dressed and grabbed his jacket and back pack.

 

“Justin, where are you going?”

 

“Away from you, I don’t feel safe here. The one person I lo.. the one person I care about more than anything hurt me. You’re no better than Hobbs!” Justin spat out and walked out the door.

 

As soon as Justin left Brian’s hands began to tremble. The enormity of what he had just done along with Justin’s words hit him. He ran to the bathroom and threw up everything that was in his stomach. Tears streamed down his face as he sat on the cold marble floor. He didn’t blame Justin if he ever forgave him. Brian wondered where Justin would go for the night, and if he’d be safe.

 

Justin walked a block away from Brian’s loft then began to pace. His options were very limited on where to spend the night. He couldn’t go to his Mom’s or Deb’s, they’d kill Brian. Daphne was out of the picture. Lindsay would always be willing to give him the couch. If she saw what Brian did to him she’d try to keep Gus away from him. Brian loved his son dearly. He couldn’t do that to him, no matter what he was feeling right now. By default that only left one other person he could think of.

 

Emmett came to the door wearing a t shirt that said ‘It’s good to be the Queen’ and pajama bottoms. “Hey baby, come on in.” Emmett noticed Justin had been crying. “Let me guess you and the big bad wolf had another fight. Well come sit down and tell auntie Em all about it.”

 

Justin sank down on the nausea inducing orange sofa. He shrugged off his jacket.

 

Emmett got a good look at his neck and gasped. “Oh my baby!” His hand fluttered to his mouth. “Who hurt you? Does Brian know?” When Emmett looked at his face he instantly knew. “Brian did this to you!” Emmett gasped.

 

“Can I stay here just for tonight? I just can’t stay at the loft right now.”

 

“Oh of course you can baby. Michael’s at Ben’s so he won’t be here. It’ll be just us girls. We’ll have a gay ol’ time.”

 

Justin smiled a little at Emmett’s antics. “Emmett I’d like for this to just stay between the both of us. I know what he did was wrong but still I don’t want to get him in trouble with anyone.”

 

Emmett patted him on the shoulder. “I’ll not say a peep but if he keeps it up this nelly queen is going to bitch slap him into next week. I can’t believe he would physically hurt you. He’s always been so protective of you.”

 

“Well he said he didn’t mean it, that he got carried away. I believe him I just can’t be around him right now.”

 

“Do you want something to eat? I’m pretty sure there’s some Ben and Jerry’s in the freezer, soul food for the lovelorn.”

 

“I’m kinda tired Em. I just want to sleep.”

 

“Alrighty I’ll just get you a pillow and some blankets.”

 

Emmett fussed over Justin tucking him in and kissing him goodnight. When Emmett left Justin let the tears fall freely.

 

Justin had to work the lunch shift at the diner. He had to borrow a turtle neck sweater from Emmett. Thank God it was still winter. Justin tensed when Brian came in. He figured he had a fifty fifty chance of him showing up. He really didn’t think he could deal with Brian right now.

 

Brian sat down at the counter observing Justin. Except for the missing Sunshine smile he seemed ok. When he walked past Brian snagged the hem of his apron. He didn’t want to grab his wrist or touch him causing him to freak out. “We need to talk.”

 

“I’m busy.”

 

“What time do you get off? I’ll come pick you up.”

 

“You’re assuming that I’ll even go with you.” Justin really looked at Brian. He had dark circles under his eyes like he hadn’t slept well. Brian was giving him his wounded puppy dog look that was quickly melting Justin’s heart. “You can pick me up at nine. Can I get you anything?”

 

“Just coffee.”

 

Justin handed over the cup. Their fingers brushed each other. When Justin didn’t jerk away Brian took that as a sign of hope.

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Brian picked Justin up at the diner at nine. The trip back to the loft was made in silence. They both stood there in the middle of the room staring at each other.

 

Frustrated Brian ran a hand through his hair. “I never meant to hurt you Justin only scare you a little, to teach you a lesson. You’re too trusting and if you trust the wrong person you could get hurt. Obviously I did a great job proving that. I fucked up.”

 

Justin sighed “I know you didn’t really mean it. It just really freaked me out. You’ve never hurt me before. You’ve always taken care of me and protected me. You’ve never forced me to do anything I didn’t want to do. If anything like this happens again that’s it I’m done and I’m gone. I will not put up with shit like that. I’m not gonna start being your punching bag.”

 

Brian nodded solemnly “fair enough.”

 

“In case you’re wondering I stayed at Emmett’s last night. He made a promise not to tell anyone. So it happened, it’s done, it’s finished. Let’s just put it behind us and move on ok?”

 

Brian held him in his arms breathing in his wonderful scent. “I’d like that.”

 

Justin rested his head against Brian’s strong chest listening to his heart beat. “I’m sorry I compared you to Hobbs. I didn’t mean it.”

 

Brian kissed the small scar on his temple. “Forget it we're moving on remember.”

 

They both stripped and got under the soft duvet. Brian was surprised when Justin cuddled right up to him resting his head on his chest. He wrapped an arm around him. With his boy in his arms where he belonged Brian could sleep easy.

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