Fathers

Carlisle

Part Four

By Memya, Empress of Edit

This is an extremely unexpected turn of events, not entirely out of keeping with Edward's personality but a shock to all of us nonetheless. It seems Edward has fallen hard for Isabella Swan or Bella, as he says she prefers to be called. He is planning to bring her to meet us. I had no idea things with her had progressed to that point.

One day he's battling his need to kill her and the next, he says he's in love. I've no reason to doubt what he says he feels but how do we deal with this? A human and vampire relationship can only end in heartbreak no matter how one looks at it. If he doesn't have enough self-control, then she'll either be changed, in the least of bad circumstances, or simply killed, in the worst. Either way, I'd better put everything in place in case we need to leave the area quickly. Best not leave it to the last minute.

It's not that I don't trust Edward, if he says he can handle the lure of her blood, I must assume he will be able to do so but one slip, one graze of his sharp teeth and there's a tragedy looming. And let's just say that nothing like that happens, that the relationship simply runs his course or he tires of her.

He is, after all, still in many ways a teenage boy and his interest is sure to wane over time. What happens when he is through with her as must happen, mustn't it? His mind is already so far beyond hers that he's sure to become bored. He has a century of experiences while hers doesn't even span two decades. What can they have in common? There is that old adage `Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' and if Bella decided to be vindictive after a break-up, well, again, I must have everything in place for a quick getaway.

But my concern is the pull of her blood combined with the pull of her, well, of her body. None of us have attempted to have a physical relationship with a human. They are both teenagers and sooner or later, and I pray that it may be later, it will come to that. He's inexperienced in controlling his blood lust while giving in to his physical lust. How will he deal with all the conflicting desires?

I think he's heading for serious trouble. The females up in Denali have taken male human lovers for years but they've had one thousand years to learn the control necessary and in the beginning they were still killing at the end of their encounters. They embraced what we jokingly call a 'vegetarian' lifestyle when they came to care for their victims and over the years developed enough self-control to make it possible. Does Edward possess that much control?

Even a few months ago, I'd have said of course, he did but then he met Bella and I have the memory of his face on the first day he smelled her blood in my mind. Then again, I'm wondering, now that I ponder it, if maybe his reaction was more an instantaneous sexual arousal as much as thirst. Could it be I misunderstood, that Edward misunderstood, himself?

He caused a huge confrontation at our home with his attraction to Bella, even before he came to realize that's what it was. The day he saved her from being crushed by a classmate's van, Rosalie wanted her dead. She saw Bella's realization that Edward isn't human as a very real threat to all of us. Her husband, Emmett, of course, sided with her. When doesn't he? And Jasper, simply being the pragmatic soldier, knew she was a threat to us and believed, perhaps rightly, that she should be eliminated. He volunteered to do it, quickly and quietly and as painlessly as possible but Edward violently objected.

I found Edward's behavior confusing at first. It would have seemed to me to be a reasonable response to the threat to our family and one we've rarely had to employ, but, of course, I never condone killing, not if there were any other response possible. I was confused, as well, as to why he had saved the girl. He wasn't interested in her, or so I believed at the time and we've seen our share of senseless deaths over our many years so why did he risk all of us for this one?

Alice provided the missing puzzle piece when she softly stated that she was going to love Bella . . . 'too'. Edward was stunned by her words. I don't believe he'd even considered for a moment that what he was feeling was attraction. Again, I wonder how a bright and talented young man could be so out of touch with his own feelings. Has he simply spent so many years burying and denying them that they no longer had any meaning for him? What teenage boy needs his sister to inform him that he's in love?

And since then, he's taken to spending his night's at her house, watching her sleep. He says he's careful and Chief Swan hasn't a clue, nor has Bella, but one slip up and he's caught. What would the implications of that be?

I think there's a part of him that doesn't trust Rosalie not to take the action she threatened, to kill Bella. And if I am honest, he should be watchful of her. Edward has special insight into her mind, since he can hear her thoughts and her enmity toward Bella is more than just the risk to us. She resents Bella's humanness. She dislikes her simply because Edward dared to prefer Bella to her. Over the years, I've taken Rosalie's shallowness for granted but I never thought she could be so jealous over a young man she thinks of as a brother. The thought that he chose Bella when all those years ago he refused her still rankles. Enough to kill? I can't say.

 

* * *
 

We've met the girl and she seems very nice in a sweet, unformed kind of way. There doesn't seem to be a very strong personality there but perhaps she was just quiet around us so I didn't get to know her well.

Edward introduced her to us, played some music for her and then they went upstairs to his bedroom. I did think to object to that but Esme said I should let them be. Things seem to be moving very quickly between them and where can this lead? If they should become intimate, will he have enough control?

Beyond that, I should certainly have a word with him about safe sex. While vampire women are incapable of producing offspring, I have heard, over my long lifetime, legends of vampire-human pregnancies and the outcome is irrefutably fatal for the mother. How could it not be? This concerns me greatly.

The interesting thing is we've seen a new Edward whom none us have ever known, even me, who's known him the longest. The perfect cool personality has been replaced with something far warmer and more emotional in all ways. Not only is he passionate about her but his other emotions seem to be returning as well. He is more angry, more sad, more happy, more thoughtful, it's hard to explain but he seems more alive in general.

Well, not, of course, more alive as that's not possible but . . . More human maybe. The differences aren't physical and no one outside of our family would be aware of the changes but they're there. Whether they will be good or bad in the long run, I can't know for sure but for better or for worse it is fascinating to see my son coming 'alive'.
 

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