Headaches
Chapter 5
Sitting at his desk at Memorial, Reid glanced at the framed photo Luke had brought in just a few days earlier. Despite Reid’s incessant complaints, Miriam and Luke had arranged to have a photographer come to the house to take a few candid photos of the babies and then several posed pictures of all five of them together. Miriam even had a couple of pictures taken with her three grandchildren. The end result hadn’t come out too bad.
Luke, as always, looked perfect, the twins hadn’t puked on anyone; Reid thought even he looked passable, and Ethan was all smiles.
Ethan. Reid pressed the heels of his hands to his temples. Was that engaging smile covering up an assortment of painful emotions the kid didn’t know how to deal with?
Reid tried to be a good father, gathering what he hoped were the best parts of role models like Holden, Jack, and especially Bob. Had it not been enough, or was this new hurdle inevitable?
The remainder of the weekend Ethan had seemed subdued. He spoke to Andy a few times and even talked on the phone with Jacob. The kid seemed to understand all Reid had explained to him about the need to take his time growing up before he dove into the world of gay sex, or any sex for that matter.
It was the alcohol that frightened Reid the most. Of all things to get from Luke, why did it have to be the urge to numb any pain with booze? Luke had only had one or two threatening urges to drink during their life together, and he had used his well-learned strategies of calling for help before he fell off the wagon. Maybe they should have shared some of those experiences with Ethan. Reid shook his head, not knowing the answer was unbearable. He could fix the most accident-mangled brain, but when it counted most personally, he may not be able to fix his own son.
It seemed as if Ethan was getting the message that no matter what you did to destroy your body, there would be a happy ending. Reid had purposely avoided being too brutally honest with his son about the anguish and panic over Luke’s last kidney transplant. Clearly protecting the kid may have been the wrong choice.
“Damn!” Reid pounded his fist against his desk.
“And good morning to you too.” Chris walked into the office, closing the door behind him.
“What happened to knocking on the Chief of Staff’s door and waiting to be invited in?”
“I have been knocking, and there was no answer. Your assistant claimed you were in here, despite the silence, so I barged in, concerned that something might be wrong.”
“I may have been having a morning quickie with my husband.” Reid smirked.
“You may have been, but since Jason and I have an appointment for the twins one month physical in about thirty minutes I’d imagine Luke is home dressing them to the nines.”
Nodding, Reid gestured to the chair on the opposite side of his desk, inviting Chris to take a seat. “How’s Katie?”
“She’s fine and the boys are both well. However, I get the sense that something’s wrong in the Oliver-Snyder household and you’re bringing it to work.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Mark filled me in on your rounds with the interns this morning. He practically had to pick them up off the floor since you seemed to be doing your best to crush their spirits completely and irrevocably.”
“I’m always tough on the interns. It’s the way I can ensure they’ll be the best.”
“I gathered you were particularly difficult, even for you, this morning.” Chris sat up straight in the chair. “Look, Reid, Mark and I have both seen you this morning. We’re your friends, whether you like to admit it or not, and we know you. Something’s wrong. Is Luke sick again?”
“No, nothing like that.”
“Is it the kids? Are you finally getting a dose of sleepless nights from colic?”
“Nothing like that either. It’s Ethan.” Reid stood up, turning his back to Chris. “Shit! I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”
“I’m a doctor; we’re trained to keep confidences.”
“This past weekend, aside from anything else, he decided to begin experimenting physically with another kid.”
“He made out with a date. That’s hardly worrisome. He is a teenager.”
“Mutual hand jobs.”
“Ahhh, gay sex part 1.”
Turning around, Reid glared at Chris. “You knew he was interested in boys?”
“I’m also a father. Ethan may have dropped some hints to Jacob, who needed to talk to someone he could trust with his cousin’s confidences.”
“Did Ethan also fill Jacob in on his newest form of dealing with the pain from his past to present? He’s been more than just experimenting with alcohol. Ethan’s using his big brother’s ultimate success as an example that it’s not such a bad tactic to drink away your problems.”
“What!”
“Ethan seems to be selective about his confessions. We found him at the farm. He’d spent the night drinking and then slept with his new boyfriend -- only slept.”
Chris’ mouth opened then closed. He shook his head. “Luke almost died at about Ethan’s age.”
“I know!” Reid ran his hand through his hair. “My son might be killing himself. I tried to get through to him, but I just don’t know if I did.”
“What does Luke think?”
“Luke thinks the best of everyone except himself. He blames himself for being a bad example and is convinced our talk with Ethan over the weekend solved the problem.”
“But you’re not convinced.”
“How many people who have successfully numbed their pain with alcohol stopped because someone told them it was dangerous?”
“Teens seem to be able to find alcohol, or some type of drugs, anywhere these days. I wish I hadn’t seen as many cases of alcohol and substance abuse as I have. Pediatricians aren’t supposed to deal with that crap, but we do more and more.”
“So tell me, Dr. Hughes. How can I help my son?” Reid made sure to keep any sarcasm out of his voice. He needed the support of his friend, and he was the closest thing to an expert in this matter he could go to.
“Luke needs to get involved.”
“Why Luke? Luke’s been sober for over a decade.”
“That’s right, but the memories they share are closely linked. The pain of their mutual past is powerful. If Ethan is following in his brother’s footsteps, whether on purpose or not, it might be his brother who can pull him out of a downward spiral before he gets too far into it.” Chris sighed. “Do you know if this is his first time drinking?”
“No, I don’t; it sounded like he’s done this before. I do think this is the most he’s had in one night.”
“Luke should take him to a meeting.”
Reid’s eyes narrowed. “What kind of meeting?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Reid. Luke should bring him to an Alateen meeting.”
“Ethan’s not an alcoholic.”
“Not yet, but Luke was a teen alcoholic. He’s the one who can share the downside of the choice to turn to alcohol. You, Dr. Oliver-Snyder are way too disciplined and appropriate in your behavior for Ethan to listen to you, especially if the booze has already given him some gratification.”
“I don’t want Luke to have to go back there.”
“If Ethan is drinking, and he knows about it, I can almost guarantee he already has. Going to a meeting might help them both.” Chris stood up, walking around the desk. He gently squeezed Reid’s shoulder. “Let’s face it, Luke and Faith have both suffered from addictions. It shouldn’t be a complete shock that Ethan would turn to this when remembering his parents.”
“Is it because we decided to have the babies? Did we make the wrong decision?” Reid brushed his hand over his face. “I can’t believe I’m asking you this.”
“Reid, you and Luke can’t plan your entire lives around Ethan’s anticipated needs. Maybe the babies set off memories of his parents, their love, and their ongoing instability. Whatever brought him to feeling the pain again, he’s the one who chose to deal with it by drinking it away.”
“Do you really think I have to ask Luke to go back there; to a time that put him over the edge?”
“Go together, but let Luke lead the way. This is about Luke and Ethan. You have to be the supporting character in this drama.”
“Can you or Jason give me some information to share with them? I want Luke, and Ethan, to hear all this from me.”
“Okay. I unfortunately have more need to keep the brochures from AA at my fingertips than I’d like. I’ll send Jason up here with them while I’m with the babies. Then I’ll send Luke up here to see you and fill you in on the results of the exam. I won’t say a word.”
“Bob must be very proud of you. You’ve become a brilliant pediatrician.” Reid looked directly at Chris, wanting to clearly convey that his words weren’t empty compliments. Chris had truly grown over the years since his foolish choices of a decade earlier had nearly caused him to kill himself.
“My dad is proud of both his sons in the medical profession.” Chris nodded in Reid’s direction, opened the door, and left the office before he could respond.
Luke would show up soon, babies in tow. Reid hoped Jason would have some helpful information to share, and that he could convince Luke to follow through with Ethan while not blaming himself the entire way.
[TBC]