Life at Fifty

He never came back. Well, that’s not entirely true. Justin still visits every now and then. He comes to see his mom and sister. He stops by to check on Debbie and Carl. We usually run into each other at the diner or Woody’s. He calls me sometimes. Usually on my birthday. He’s never moved back to Pittsburgh, though. Brian and Justin has been a thing of the past for a very long time now.

Justin wasn’t a success right away. After about six months of having me pay his bills and enduring a severe lack of interest in his art, Justin was about to give up and come home. That was until a young man, only three years older than Justin who happened to be rich, decided to become Justin’s benefactor. Daniel Franklin Harrington III.

“He’s giving me my own gallery!” Justin said excitedly one night. He’d called to tell me everything, not realizing it was almost four in the morning. How was he to know I had just gotten to sleep and had a meeting in three hours?

“That’s great,” I responded. “But what does he want out of it?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you honestly think this guy is shelling out money for your own gallery strictly because he likes your art?” I couldn’t help myself. I admit it. I was jealous.

“That’s what he says and I trust him,” Justin answered. I couldn’t keep from smiling.

“You’re far too trusting, Sunshine, but that’s one of the reasons I love you.” And it turned out Justin was right. This guy was just after his art. At first anyway.

They worked really well together. Daniel, or Danny as Justin calls him, provided the money needed to run the gallery and Justin provided the art for its walls. Turns out, once Justin got out on his own and set his own prices, he couldn’t paint them fast enough. The owner of the gallery that was originally showing Justin’s art set the prices so high that no one in their right mind would buy them. Justin’s work was outshining his favorite artist in display alone; he didn’t want them to outsell the little fuck toy hack wannabe artist. Fortunately for Justin people gave his gallery a chance, ignoring his original prices, and were pleasantly surprised by the lower dollar amounts.

So he stayed in New York, painting and making millions like we all knew he would. He and Daniel started spending more and more time together. They had a lot in common and it helped that they were close to the same age. Justin started rushing through his phone calls with me. We talked less and less until it came down to me getting his voicemail more often than not and him rarely at best returning my calls. Then, the phone call I expected finally came after almost two years.

“I never wanted to hurt you, Brian,” he said after explaining to me that he and Daniel had been officially a couple for about a month.

“It’s not a big deal, really. He’s there, I’m here. Long distance relationships never work out anyway.” I was amazed at how calm I was. My voice wasn’t shaking at all.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“Sorry’s bullshit.” Then I hung up before he could respond. I was late for Gus’ birthday party after all. He’d called me at the office. I really don’t know which hurt worse. The fact that Justin had broken up with me over the phone or the fact that he’d done it on what was supposed to be our anniversary and didn’t even realize it.

That, however, was fourteen years ago. I am three weeks away from turning fifty and I’m still single. Justin and Daniel got married about five years ago, shortly after congress made gay marriage legal in the United States. I wasn’t at the wedding, though I’d received an invitation. I was told that Justin was hurt that I wasn’t there. I think I would have cared except that the part of my heart responsible for that had been ripped out by Justin years ago.

But enough about that. Let’s talk about something else. It only took a year for Melanie and Lindsay to realize that moving to Canada was a really fucking bad idea. In order for Mel to practice law she would have to go back to school to learn Canadian law and be recertified. That would have taken at least four years. Canada also has different requirements for their teachers, meaning Lindsay had to go back to school as well. Neither of them had the time, nor the money to do that. They got what jobs they could but when they were denied citizenship they came home.

We’ve been living in the country manor together since then. I refuse to refer to this house by the name given to it by Justin. Melanie and I have actually become very good friends. Especially since she was the only one home when Justin broke up with me and I couldn’t keep everything inside. She held me while I cried and we even got drunk together. There hasn’t been a snarky comment between us since. She even taught Jenny to call me Uncle Brian which she continues to this day even though she knows I’m of no blood relation.

Gus has grown into a fine young man. He turned twenty not too long ago and is a Junior at Harvard studying pre-law. He looks exactly like me and is, much to Lindsay’s dismay, gay. I told her that he could still give her grandchildren. I mean, look at me. Lindsay’s also a little disappointed that Gus has plans to be a lawyer rather than using the art skills he got from his mother. Personally, I just want the kid to be happy. I’m the one paying for the education so I want him to do something he likes.

Jenny Rebecca is equally as amazing. She looks exactly like Melanie. With Michael and Mel for parents she got jipped in the height department, standing all of five feet two inches. She’s a lot like Michael only she doesn’t whine nearly as much. She turned seventeen recently and is a senior in high school. Though she still has some time to go, she’s already been accepted to PIFA to study dance. She’s one of the best dancers I’ve seen. I agreed to pay for her education as well since I know Linds and Mel don’t have the money for it.

After they moved in with me it was a little while before either of them found a job. Lindsay had gotten to the point of giving up. I told her I could more than afford for her to stay home with the kids so she did. I am a millionaire after all and have been for at least ten years. I told Melanie that she could stay home too but she got bored quickly so she went back to work. The house is big enough that we never really bother each other but we’re still close as a family. The kids have managed to grow up in the same house with three parents that love them and have two more adoring parents right across town. And how many kids can say they have a total of ten grandparents? Debbie and Carl are constantly visiting the kids. Jennifer and Tucker come over for dinner at least once a month.  Lindsay’s parents came around and accepted her lifestyle and her family. Melanie’s parents have always been on her side and Ben’s parents came into the picture about six years ago. Let me just say those kids are spoiled rotten.

Then there is the sibling that is a mere thirteen years old. Her name is Alexandra Rachel Kinney and she is the daughter of myself and Melanie. That’s right. When they wanted to have another baby I was willing to donate sperm and everything was going as planned until Lindsay hit menopause early. She thought their chances were ruined. The shift in my relationship with Melanie and my ever changing personality made it so that Mel was willing to carry my child. Just as before, it worked on the first try and nine months later, Alexandra was born.

Now, imagine if you will, my brain in Melanie’s body. That’s Alex. Her personality is so like me it’s scary at times. I imagine she’s exactly like I would have been if my parents actually wanted me. The thing is, she looks just like Mel. She got her height from me though so people mistake Alex for the older sibling. It irritates JR to no end and Alex loves it. She has plans to follow in my footsteps but I expect that to change as she gets older. Gus and JR said the same thing at Alex’s age. For some reason thirteen year olds tend to look up to me but only until they come to their senses.

Even though Justin and I broke up, Jennifer remains close to me. She likes Daniel and loves that her son is happy, but she’s said more than once that she wishes Justin had come back and married me instead. We’d become very good friends before Justin went to New York and she wanted to keep it that way. She’s a firm believer in “Just because your kid breaks up with his boyfriend doesn’t mean you have to.” When she told me that it made me laugh. We have lunch together every now and then and I refer people to her regularly. She’s still selling houses and doing very good at it.

So there you have it. Our little family. JR spends time with Mikey and Ben regularly. Mel, Linds, Gus, JR, Alex and I all go on vacation together at least once a year. I’m usually the one that pays for everything. Gus and JR each received cars for their sixteenth birthdays and I intend to do the same for Alex. When JR was five she asked for a pony for her birthday. He was one of fifteen horses to come and go from our stable. I remember Gus got mad at me.

“How come I didn’t get a pony for my birthday?” He was nine at the time and pouting was no longer cute.

“You didn’t ask,” I told him. That just made him angrier and it made me laugh. I really do spoil those kids, giving them whatever they want, and everyone tells me I should stop. Since when have I done what everyone tells me? The very same year that gay marriage was made legal I had a plethora of weddings to attend. Well, I had a plethora of wedding invitations anyway. I didn’t attend all of them. The first to wed, much to no one’s surprise, were Michael and Ben. That was on May 14th. Debbie and Carl married soon after on May 28th and Jennifer and Tucker followed on June 10th. Theodore and Blake came next on June 19th, then Lindsay and Melanie on July 22nd. Justin and Daniel got married on September 17th. Emmett made a lot of money planning the weddings and the parties that came from the wedding guests. Emmett and his man Calvin were married on November 4th and even my beloved Cynthia married her beau, Todd, on December 23rd.

A lot of weddings in a short amount of time. And let’s make this like that horrid Hugh Grant movie that we’d all love to forget. Amongst all these weddings I had to attend the funeral of one Joan Margaret Franklin Kinney on October 12th. So that year I attended seven of the eight weddings I was invited to, and a funeral. Though others managed to keep the tissue industry in business I managed to make it through without a single tear. I guess I really have become the heartless bastard I tried so hard to make everyone believe I was.

A common theme among these weddings was the involvement of Gus, JR and Alex. Though Gus and JR were too old to be the ring bearer or the flower girl, that was Alex’s job, they were involved somehow. It was said that whoever happened to be getting married wanted the kids to feel important. A nice sentiment yes but completely unnecessary. Something else that was both unnecessary and unwanted were the looks of pity thrown my way. I don’t need pity simply because I’m single. I can’t say that it’s my choice to be this way but I’ve come to terms with it and I’m happy with my life as it is. I really see no point in being miserable.

I have a good life for the most part. I have two beautiful children. I have a thriving business with offices in LA, New York and Chicago as well as the headquarters here in Pittsburgh. I have an amazing home that I share with a family that I love. I have friends that I couldn’t be closer to. Just because the only man I ever loved fell out of love with me and in love with someone else without ever returning the heart he stole doesn’t mean I have to be miserable. I mean, the fact that the longest relationship I’ve had since Justin only lasted about a week shouldn’t mean I’m unhappy, right?

Just because everyone around me is in a happily committed relationship while I’m approaching fifty and still single doesn’t mean I want to change my life. I like being able to do what I want when I want without having to check with anyone first. If I want to have a drink after work, I do. No calling and checking with the wife to see if it’s okay. If I want to leave town for a couple of days, so be it. There’s no one to hold me back. That's not true, I have to check with Linds and Mel to see if Alex or JR have anything planned that I don't want to miss, but other than that, I'm free to do as I wish and I wouldn't have it any other way.

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