Diagnosis

Brian walked into the diner and slumped down into the booth. He kept his sunglasses on and leaned his elbows on the table, putting his head in his hands. It was about two weeks after the Rage party and he felt like shit the entire time. The past week had been the worst. He hadn't had a trick in all that time and he had these skull splitting headaches that nothing could get rid of.

"Another headache?" Michael asked. Brian simply nodded.

"Are you sure you should be going to work?" Ted asked.

"I don't have a choice; I have a client meeting today. I have to go whether I want to or not," Brian responded without looking up.

"But you're totally useless when you have one of these headaches," Emmett pointed out.

"Doesn't change the fact that I have to go. I'll explain to them at the beginning of the meeting that I have a serious headache and let them decide what happens. But it's the client's decision, not mine." He gave Debbie a thank you nod when she poured him a cup of coffee.

"Maybe you should get it checked out, sweetie. I mean......you've never had headaches like this before. And they've happened every day this week," she pointed out.

"I'll call my doctor from work. I've been thinking about it anyway." They all just nodded and sat there in silence. The last couple of times Brian had been around them with this type headache he wanted as much quiet as possible. Luckily the diner was practically empty. After a cup of coffee and a couple of slices of bacon, Brian looked at his watch.

"I've got to get going."

"I assume you're not going out with us tonight?" Michael asked.

"Not unless this headache goes away," Brian muttered before walking out the door. The guys weren't at all surprised when Brian didn't show up at Babylon that night. They were, however, very worried.

 

*****
 

"So.....what brings you in today Brian?" Dr Henderson asked as he entered the room.

"You know.....I don't see the point in telling everything to the nurse if I’m just gonna have to turn around and tell it to you too," he said grumpily. He'd had to suffer through the entire weekend and was hurting even more than before.

"It's verification. Force of habit. A lot of times with abuse cases they tell the nurse one thing and tell me something else. So.....humor an old man and tell me what seems to be the problem." He smiled slightly and Brian sighed.

"I've had these serious headaches the last couple of weeks."

"What kind of headaches?"

"The 'I can barely see straight it hurts so much' kind," Brian answered.

"Is it a localized pain in one area?" Brian shook his head and immediately regretted it.

"It's my whole fucking head. Feels like somebody's trying to squeeze my brains out or something." Dr Henderson made some notes in the folder, then put it down and walked over to Brian. He pulled out his stethoscope and did the usual checks, then checked Brian's blood pressure and his temperature.

"Well.......other than the headaches you seem perfectly healthy."

"That's good to know," Brian said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm going to schedule you for some tests. MRI, blood work, bone scan....." Dr Henderson started to list off all the tests.

"Whoa......wait a minute, Doc.....why do I need all those tests? They're just headaches. Can't you just give me some painkillers and call it a day?"

Dr Henderson sighed and looked Brian in the eye. He didn’t like it when doctors did that. Especially doctors that were talking to him about him. It meant bad news. It always did.

"Brian......the symptoms you described lead me to believe that this could be a lot more serious than just headaches." That got Brian's heart beating faster.

"Like.......like what?" Brian swallowed hard.

"There's a history of cancer in your family, isn't there?" Brian nodded and there was about a two second delay before it hit him.

"Wait a minute......you think I have cancer?" Brian made his hands into fists to keep them from shaking.

"It is a possibility, yes. I'll know more after the tests."

"When......when are the tests?"

"The earliest I can do it is next Monday morning."

"Next Monday? I'm supposed to spend the whole fucking week wondering if I have cancer or not? I don't fucking think so!"

"Brian, you’re not my only patient. I have a full schedule of tests and appointments until then. And......to be completely honest one week won't really matter. If you do have cancer waiting one week is not going to make a difference in whether or not the treatment is successful and if you don't then there's no harm done."

"Except the heart attack I have from worrying all fucking week!" Brian was almost shouting.

"Brian, just calm down. Worrying won't get you anywhere. And think of it this way. If I thought that it was very serious I would push everything back to get the tests done now. Cancer is just a possibility, it's not a guarantee, but I have to rule it out before we can find out what's really wrong. Okay?"

Brian took several deep breaths and let them out slowly, trying to calm down. He'd never been so scared in his life, not even when facing a drunken, angry Jack. He simply nodded and Dr Henderson patted him on the shoulder.

"Make sure you have the day off next Monday. You're going to be at the hospital testing all day." Brian once again nodded, then the doctor left.

"Asshole," he said to the man's retreating back.

After getting the necessary information for the tests Brian called in and said he wasn't going to come in the rest of the day and then he went to the diner. The rest of his friends were at work so Brian sat alone in the booth. It was late enough that the breakfast rush was gone, but early enough that the lunch rush hadn't come in yet. Debbie knew that Brian was going to the doctor today and the fact that he was sitting there made her worry.

"Mind if I join you?" she asked. Brian shook his head and she slid into the seat across from him. They were silent for several minutes, Brian just staring down at his folded hands on the tabletop. Debbie could tell that something was bothering him, but she knew Brian well enough to know he wasn't going to spill it on his own.

"Well?" she asked.

"Well what?" Brian said without looking up.

"Well......what did the doctor say?"

"I have to go next Monday for tests." Brian's voice was low and monotone. Debbie could tell that he wasn't really all there. That worried her even more.

"What kind of tests?" At that moment Brian looked up. Debbie noticed the reflection of light on his cheeks and realized that he was crying. She hadn't seen Brian cry in years. She also hadn't noticed it while his head was down. She reached across the table and took his hands in hers. "Brian......" He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"He thinks it's cancer." His voice was shaking as he said it and Debbie's heart just sank when she heard it.

She moved over to Brian's side of the table and hugged him. She wasn't surprised when he hugged back, resting his head on her shoulder. He was shaking like a leaf. Debbie knew that Jack died of cancer, as had Brian's grandfather. There was a distinct likelihood that's what it was and that scared her almost as much as it scared him. She didn't realize until she felt her shirt getting wet that Brian was really crying. Not just single tears rolling down each cheek but outright sobbing. She started to rock him gently.

"Shhhh, Brian......baby. I'm sure you're gonna be fine." He sat back and looked at her. The look on his face just made her heart break.

"How can you say that? How can you know that?"

"Because, honey, you're a fighter. You always have been and you always will be. You never let anything or anyone get you down. You've fought so hard to get where you are......I don't see you giving up the fight so easily." She smiled and reached out to wipe the tears from his cheeks.

"I don't know if I can fight this." It was almost whispered. The amount of fear in Brian's voice made Debbie just want to pull him to her and protect him from everything. She'd never really been able to protect him from Jack when he was a kid and she couldn't protect him from himself when he got out of that house, but it never stopped her from wanting to. Once again there was something she couldn't protect him from.

"Brian......you can fight it. I know you can. And I'll be there to help you. We all will. You won't be in this alone, okay?" She smiled slightly and managed to get a nod from him. He wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve and for a split second he looked like a kid again.

"Don't tell anybody, okay? I just.......I didn't mean to tell you, to be honest. Not until I knew for sure." He looked down at the table again and Debbie just nodded.

"I won't tell a soul."
 

*****

Later that evening Debbie proved that she really couldn't keep her mouth shut when she was worried about someone. She'd been mixing up orders and hadn't been paying attention and it was obvious to everyone that something was wrong. She made her way over to the table where Michael, Ben, Ted and Emmett were sitting and delivered the wrong orders.

"Oh, I'm sorry boys. I'll fix that." She started to grab the plates when Michael's hand stopped her.

"Ma......what's wrong?"

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong. Why would anything be wrong?" That immediately put them all on the defensive.

"Debbie, you've never mixed up an order in all the time I've known you," Emmett said.

"Yeah, I never complain about the service when you're here," Ted chimed in with a smirk.

"Ma.......is it Uncle Vic?" Michael's voice was so thick with concern that Debbie just had to give in.

"No, honey. Vic's fine. It's....." she sighed. "It's Brian."

"What about Brian? Is he okay?" She looked around at the four faces that were pointed directly at her, completely oblivious to the fact that Justin, who was working that night, had slowed down filling the water glasses on the table next to them so that he could listen in on the conversation.

"He made me promise not to tell anybody. He wasn't even gonna tell me until he knew for sure."

"Tell you what?" Emmett insisted. Once again Debbie sighed.

"You know those headaches Brian's been getting lately?" she asked and they all nodded. "He's gonna kill me for this."

"We won't let on that we know, right, guys?" Ben, who had been quiet so far, chimed in. They all nodded.

"Brian's doctor thinks it might be cancer. He's going next week for tests. You have to swear to me you won't let him know that you know," she insisted. They all nodded and she went back to work. Justin stood there completely still. He couldn't believe it. He shook his head to clear it then went back to work though he was unable to think about anything else but Brian.

 

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