12 Steps to Happiness

Part 7
 

Brian woke up the next morning with Justin in his arms and felt for the first time since receiving Daphne’s call that everything was going to be alright. Even though he knew the road would be rough, he believed that Justin had finally turned a corner and was ready to face his demons and conquer his addiction. He was content to just hold Justin in his arms, blocking out the present, but was brought out of his thoughts by his ringing cell phone. Trying hard not to disturb the blond in his arms, he reached for his phone and answered in a whisper.

“Hello?”

“Brian, Gardner here. I was calling to see where you stood with your personal crisis. Are you going to need a lot of time? I am just trying to figure out where I stand with the Liberty Air account. They are due here next week and expect to see you here.” Gardner explained.

“Gardner, I told you that I didn’t know when I would be back. That’s why I asked for an extended leave of absence. I’m not sure when I will be able to make it back. Things are still kind of up in the air and I am needed here. The best I can do is work on the campaign from my laptop and send you my ideas, but you are going to have to handle things on that end.” Brian told him, noticing that Justin had awakened and was watching him intently.

“Brian, you are a partner now. I expect more from you than the others. We have a company to run and I don’t even know where my partner is!” Gardner exclaimed, hoping to get Brian to come back.

“I told you before I left that I had a family emergency. That is more important to me than anything else right now. If you can’t handle that, buy me out. Otherwise, get off my back. It’s your call.” Brian kept his voice emotionless, trying to keep his anger at bay. As if he would ever leave Justin at a time like this.

“Brian, you know that’s not what I want. I just need you here.” Gardner calmed himself down. The last thing he needed was to cause Brian to leave the firm. He had exaggerated the situation a bit when he told Brian that all the clients would stay with him if he let Brian go. In truth, they had all been willing to follow Brian to the ends of the earth if they had to and Vangard would fold if that were to happen.

“I can’t be there right now. You will have to settle with what I can do from here. Email me what I need to know about the Liberty meeting and I will work on it this week and have it to you by Monday. That’s the best I can offer.” Brian told him.

“Alright, but I expect you back as soon as you can get away.” Gardner told him before slamming down the phone. It killed him to know that he relied on Brian as much as he did.

Brian tossed his phone back on the coffee table, happy to know that he had won with Gardner. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Justin’s lips.

“Good morning, Sunshine. Did you sleep well?” He asked with a smirk.

“Very well, but Brian, you need to go home. I couldn’t hear all of your conversation, but it was obvious that Gardner wants you back. I’ll be alright here without you.” Justin assured him, saddened by the thought of Brian going back to the Pitts.

“Trying to get rid of me already?” Brian teased.

“No, but you have already put your life on hold for me. I don’t want you to put your job in jeopardy because of me.” Justin explained.

“Justin, Gardner needs me more than I need him, and even if he didn’t I told you I am going to be here for you and I meant it.” Brian could see a hint of joy in Justin’s eyes and knew there was no way he would leave.

“But…” Justin tried again, before being silenced with a quick kiss.

“No buts. Now get your ass up and make me breakfast. I’m starving.” Brian said as he pushed Justin to get up.

“Yes sir!” Justin replied with a giggle.

“You should always be so obedient.” Brian joked back. He watched Justin walk into the kitchen before struggling to get up. His ankle was beginning to feel better, but it was still pretty sore and stiff when he woke up. After making his way to the bathroom to relieve himself, he crutched his way into the kitchen and plopped down in the nearest chair. “So Sunshine, what do you want to do today?”

“Brian, you are in no condition to do anything yet, thanks to me.” Justin said with a haunted look in his eyes.

“There will be none of that, Justin. It was an accident. You need to stop blaming yourself. What do you say we rent some movies and just hang out at home?” Brian suggested, knowing that the first few days without alcohol were going to be hard on Justin and wanted to try to make it easier for him.

Before Justin could answer, Daphne walked in looking at the two men with a question in her eyes.

“Hey, what’s going on?” She asked, wondering what had happened after she had gone to sleep. Justin still hadn’t been home and she wondered what went on between the two men when he had finally showed up.

“Justin is making us breakfast. Isn’t that nice of him?” Brian kept his tone light, indicating to Daphne that all was okay at the moment.

“Good. I don’t have class for a couple of hours, but I have work tonight so God only knows when I’ll get a chance to eat again.” Daphne said, looking at Brian for some reassurance that things were okay. He gave her a small nod and eased her mind a bit.

“Daphne, I just want to say I’m sorry for all I put you through. I was a total shit to you when all you were doing was trying to help me.” Justin said shyly, appalled by his own behavior.

“It’s alright, Justin. I know you didn’t mean for it to happen.” Daphne assured him, seeing the sincere look in his eyes.

“No. Daphne, it’s not alright, but it will be. I have a drinking problem, but I am going to get the help I need to get past it. I don’t want to keep hurting myself and my friends anymore. Everything is going to be alright.” Justin could see the tears in Daphne’s eyes and knew he was the one to put them there. He had caused her so much pain in the last year and vowed to do whatever it took to make things right again.

“Oh Justin!” Daphne exclaimed as she threw herself into his arms. She finally started to see a glimpse of the old Justin and she was overjoyed that he was finally coming back to her.

“Alright, you two, enough of that. I’m still waiting for my breakfast here.” Brian joked, needing to stop the emotional stuff for a bit. He could feel tears building behind his eyes and needed to keep his feelings in check.

“Sorry Brian. How do you want your eggs?” Justin said, laughing at Brian’s whining.

“Surprise me, Sunshine. I’m easy.” Brian replied.

“Oh believe me, Brian. I know exactly how easy you are.” Justin laughed back, enjoying the easy banter between the two of them.

They trio ate their breakfast together, laughing and joking as if they didn’t have a care in the world. After the mess was all cleaned up, Daphne went to get ready for school, while Brian and Justin sat together in the living room holding hands and talking about nothing in particular. It was a comfortable conversation, neither one of them talking about the long road ahead of them. On the way to school, Daphne dropped Brian and Justin off at the hotel so they could take the Jeep back to the apartment building. Brian sat still through the ride, fearing Justin would crash his precious Jeep. Justin couldn’t help but laugh at him.

“Brian, you need to relax. I know how to drive, you know.” He chuckled, trying to ease the man’s mind.

“Don’t worry about me. Just keep your eyes on the road.” Brian replied seriously. He never liked giving up control of his Jeep to anyone.

“Oh Brian, you are too funny. Do you still want me to stop at Blockbuster and get some movies? Or would you rather I drove straight home so as not to put a scratch on your baby?” Justin teased.

“How about we just head back to your place? I can think of something we could do to keep busy.” Brian said with a smirk.

“Well, if you put it that way.” Justin replied, feeling a tightening in his groin at the thought of keeping busy with Brian.

They arrived back at the apartment and headed upstairs, with Brian leaning on Justin for support. Once they made it to the bed Brian gratefully climbed into it. He was exhausted from using his crutches to get around.

“Brian, do you need something for the pain? You look like you are hurting.” Justin asked, worried about the look that Brian was wearing.

“I’m alright, Justin. I just need to lay here for a bit and relax. Come here.” He ordered, needing to have Justin in his arms.

Justin helped Brian undress to his underwear and stripped down himself before climbing in bed beside him. They lay there in each others arms and fell asleep, content to be together at last.

Justin woke up a little while later in a cold sweat, unable to stop the shaking that was racking his body. Looking over at Brian’s sleeping form, he eased from the bed and went to the bathroom, hoping a shower would help him relax. Unfortunately, his plan didn’t work and by the time he got dried off and dressed in his robe, he was feeling even worse. He needed a drink in the worst way and didn’t know what to do about it. He really wanted to keep his promise, but was beginning to think that he couldn’t do it. He jumped when he heard Brian’s voice.

“Hey, what are you doing all the way over there?” Brian mumbled, still half asleep.

“I…uh…was just thinking about things.” Justin replied honestly.

“What were you thinking about?” Brian asked, suddenly wide awake. He noticed something was off and was beginning to get worried.

“Nothing really. Just stuff.” Justin asked, distracted.

“Justin, you need to talk to me. I told you I would be here for you, but you need to be honest, with yourself and me. Please talk to me.” Brian pleaded. He came too far to let Justin slip again.

“I can’t do it. Brian, I just can’t! I just need one drink. I promise that will be all. Look at me! I can’t stop shaking, and I don’t feel so good. Just one.” Justin begged, hating the desperation in his voice.

“Justin, come here. Let me help you get through this. Manny told you it wouldn’t be easy, but you need to hang in there. You can’t keep going on the way you have been. You need to do this, Justin. If not for yourself, do it for me. I can’t stand by and watch you destroy yourself. You will be destroying me in the process.” Brian admitted. He knew he shouldn’t put so much pressure on him, but was willing to do whatever it took to keep Justin away from drinking. Until he was able to get around on his own, Brian was helpless if Justin tried to leave.

Justin looked deeply into Brian’s eyes and saw the pain he was causing the man. He knew that for the moment, he had to try to stick it out. He climbed back on the bed and found himself being swept up into the strong arms he had missed so much. He let the tears he had been trying to hold back fall as Brian whispered soothing words to him.

“It will be okay, Justin. I promise. We will find a way to get through this. I am not going anywhere. It’s okay.” Brian felt a lump forming in his throat by the pain Justin was suffering. Even though he turned his back on God a long time ago, he couldn’t help but send up a silent prayer that they would indeed find a way to get through this.

“I’m sorry, Brian. I’m so sorry for all of this. Please don’t leave me.” Justin cried.

“I’m not leaving you, Justin. I promise you that I am going to be by your side, no matter what.” Brian assured him as he held him tight and he knew that no matter what happened, he would keep his promise.

End of part 7

11/10/03

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