Something To Prove

Chapter 10

 


Justin laid in bed for hours, trying to stop the tears that seemed to constantly fall down his face, but by four in the morning he knew he needed to talk to somebody. He hesitated a moment before reaching for the phone, knowing that it was a call he had to make. One that had been eight months overdue.

“Hello?” came a sleep filled voice.

“Uh…Kevin? It’s Justin. I’m…uh…sorry to wake you. I…need to talk to Dani,” Justin stammered.

“Justin?” Kevin replied, his voice in obvious surprise. “Hang on a minute.”

Justin waited while he listened to the muffled conversation between husband and wife before Dani got on the phone.

“Justin, is that really you? What’s wrong? Is Aaron okay?” Dani rambled quickly.

“Yeah, Aaron is fine. I’m sorry to call so late,” Justin began, his eyes tearing once again at the sound of his friend’s voice.

“Don’t apologize. I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever hear from you again,” Dani replied. “I’m so sorry for going to the Kinney’s behind your back. I just couldn’t think of any other way to help you and you needed it.”

“It’s okay Dan; I know why you did it. I would’ve done the same for you if you needed help and were too stubborn to ask. It’s actually working out pretty good here. Aaron and I settled in and at least we have a roof over our head. Well…we did. I’m not so sure it’s going to last much longer, though,” Justin admitted sadly, his eyes tearing once again. What the fuck was wrong with him anyway? He cried more than the weepiest woman on daytime TV.

“Why? What happened?” Dani asked. She waited a moment for Justin’s reply and when all she got was silence, she began to worry. “Jus? What is it? Did something happen?”

“Oh Dan, everything’s so screwed up right now and I don’t know what to do.”

Dani listened while Justin rambled on through his tears, but he was talking so fast that she couldn’t understand what he was trying to say. All she got was something about Brian being sorry and Jack and Joan being disappointed. It was evident that whatever happened was pretty serious and she wished she was there to help him through it when she suddenly had a thought.

“Jus, calm down. I’m sure that it’s not as bad as you think,” she began. “Why don’t you and Aaron come out for a visit? Maybe getting away for a few days will help you relax and you can tell me all about it.”

“I can’t,” Justin sniffed, wishing his friend was right there with him. He always felt better when she could hold him. “I’ve only been working part time. I haven’t been able to save up much money and I already owe Jack and Joan so much. I wouldn’t feel right about asking them.”

“Let me help you…and before you refuse, just listen to me. I haven’t seen you in so long and I’ve been going crazy without you. Kevin would be more than willing to spend the money if it will get me to stop brooding.”

Justin heard Kevin’s agreement in the background and smiled. He really wanted to see Dani and Kevin again. “I’m so sorry for shutting you out like that. I might have been a little hurt, but I shouldn’t have let so much time go by without calling.”

“Well you can make it up to me by letting me buy your plane tickets. Say yes and I’ll have Kevin on the phone with his friend Phil as soon as the sun comes up. He works for American Airlines and can probably get you here by the end of the day,” Dani said as she smiled at her husband. Phil was Kevin’s best friend and knew all about Dani and Justin. He’d do whatever it took to help them. “Do you think you can get the time off from work?”

“Yeah, that won’t be a problem. I know my boss only keeps me around right now because he knows I need the money. The gallery hasn’t been too busy lately due to renovations,” Justin replied.

“Good, then it’s settled. Now try to get some sleep and I’ll call you as soon as I have your flight information,” Dani instructed.

“Thanks Dan,” Justin said, fighting back a yawn. Knowing that he’d be seeing his friend soon helped ease his mind a little and he suddenly found himself completely exhausted. “You’re the best.”

“Yeah, I know,” Dani teased. “I love you Justin.”

“I love you, too.” Justin barely managed to hang up the phone before he fell into a restless sleep.

Unfortunately he didn’t get nearly enough sleep because Dani called him back four hours later with his flight information. He and Aaron needed to be at the airport by 10:00 to catch their 11:30 flight. He quickly jumped out of bed and took a shower before throwing what he needed into a bag. Then we went down to Aaron’s room and packed for him before joining the rest of the family downstairs. Aaron was eating his breakfast when Justin walked in.

“Daddy, Grandpa made pancakes. See?” Aaron said as he held up his fork.

“I see that,” Justin replied with a smile before turning to Jack. “You should’ve had Aaron come wake me up. You and Joan shouldn’t have to take care of him in the mornings. I’m sleeping a lot better now.”

“I know you are,” Jack agreed. “But when I got up around three this morning and saw that your light was on I figured you could use a little sleep. Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine,” Justin lied. “I ended up calling Dani last night. She arranged for tickets so that Aaron and I can fly out for a visit. We have to be at the airport in an hour.”

“Oh…well I guess that’s good, right?” Joan said from the doorway. She walked in while Justin was telling Jack about his plans. “I’m sure you could use a little time away.”

Justin heard a touch of sadness in Joan’s voice and felt a little guilty. “You’re not upset, are you? It’s not like we won’t be back.”

“I know. I’m just being silly. It’s just that I’m going to miss you boys while you’re gone,” Joan admitted sheepishly.

“Now Joan, stop trying to make the boy feel guilty. I think a trip west will be just the thing he needs,” Jack said, patting his wife’s back.

“You’re right,” Joan said as she looked from Jack to Justin. “I’m sure the trip will be just what you need.”

“Thanks. I promise we won’t be gone too long and I’ll make sure to have Aaron call you every other day to say hello,” Justin promised.

“Daddy, are we going away?” Aaron asked innocently.

“Yes we are buddy. We’re going to visit Aunt Dani and Uncle Kevin. In fact, we gotta hurry up or we’re going to miss our plane.”

“But what about Grandma and Grandpa? Are they going with us? And what about Uncle Brian? Who’s he going to play trains with?” Aaron asked as tears began to fill his eyes.

“Buddy, Grandma and Grandpa are going to stay here and watch the house. We won’t be gone that long, I promise. Now let’s get you upstairs so you can get cleaned up,” Justin replied, purposely refraining from commenting about Brian. “Joan, would it be too much trouble to drive us to the airport? I’m afraid there might not be enough time to get a cab.”

“Of course it’s not too much trouble. You go get Aaron ready while I clean up the kitchen and then we can go,” Joan replied.

“Thanks,” Justin said. He kissed Joan’s cheek before taking his son’s hand and heading upstairs to get ready. He couldn’t wait to get as far away from New York and Brian as he could.

By the time their plane touched down in Dallas, both Justin and Aaron were ready to get back on the ground. It was a fairly short flight, but Justin was exhausted from being up most of the night and Aaron was cranky from missing his nap. They made their way to baggage claim and grabbed their things before heading towards the exit to meet up with Dani. As soon as Justin saw his friend he realized that she’d been keeping a secret from him.

“Justin!” Dani exclaimed as she raced over to her friend. “I’m so happy to see you. And Aaron, look how big you’ve gotten.”

“He’s not the only one,” Justin replied with a chuckle. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I planned on it, but you were so upset last night that I figured it would be best to wait,” Dani explained, looking slightly chastised.

“How far along are you?”

“I’m almost seven months. Kevin’s over the moon. You should see what he’s done to the nursery. He spends all his free time in there painting and wallpapering. I swear I don’t think I’ve seen him more than an hour a day for months,” Dani laughed. “Now let’s get out of here. You haven’t even seen our new place yet.”

“Okay, let’s go.”

As soon as they arrived at the house, Kevin was at the door to greet them. He always liked Justin and was really upset with the way he’d been treating Dani. In fact, he had secretly planned to make a trip to New York in another couple of weeks to try to work things out. Dani had spent the last eight months in a serious depression over her troubled friendship and he wanted to fix things before the baby came. He was thrilled to be woken up in the middle of the night by Justin. He hoped that everything would return to normal just in time for their son or daughter to make their arrival. After a brief hello, Kevin dragged Justin upstairs to show him all his hard work while Dani went to get Aaron a drink. It had been decided that they would go out for dinner so that Dani could relax and enjoy herself. Kevin was a complete disaster in the kitchen. The evening went well and Dani and Justin spent the entire time beaming at their renewed friendship. Once they got back, Justin settled Aaron down in the guest room and read him a story until he fell asleep. Then he went downstairs to find his friend. He could tell by the way she watched him all night that she was anxious to talk about what had him calling her in the middle of the night.

“Dan?” Justin called out as he turned the corner into the living room.

“Hey, is Aaron asleep already?”

“He’s out like a light. It’s been a long, eventful day for him,” Justin replied as he plopped down on the couch beside her. “Where’s Kevin?”

“He went to bed. He wanted to give us some time alone. Aaron’s gotten so grown up since the last time I saw him.”

“Yeah, he’s growing like a weed. I can’t believe he’s almost four already. Losing his papa was hard on him in the beginning, but he’s adjusted pretty well,” Justin told her.

“What about you? You look like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. How are you doing?” she asked in concern.

“It’s been a long eight months,” Justin sighed.

“Tell me about it. Maybe I can help.”

Justin spent the next half hour telling Dani everything that happened since Wyatt’s service. He watched her tear up when he told her about his HIV scare and saw her sigh with relief when he assured her that he was fine. By the time he was done talking, the only thing she didn’t know about his life in the last eight months was the part about Brian and what happened between them. He wasn’t even sure where to begin with that one considering she never knew they had a relationship in the first place.

“Wow. I can’t believe all that you’ve been through. I really wish you would’ve called me. You know I would’ve been there for you,” Dani said as she wiped her eyes.

“I know you would have, but it was something that I had to do on my own. You have your life here with Kevin and now a baby on the way. I’m actually glad I didn’t call you sooner. The last thing you need is to worry about me,” Justin replied.

“Oh, you think that just because I haven’t talked to you I haven’t been worrying? I’ve been worried sick about you. Do you know how many times Kevin had to rip the phone from my hands so I wouldn’t call you? We just decided to give you a little time, but your time was about to run out. Once this little one was born I was going to call you and force you to talk to me. My baby needs his or her Uncle Justin in its life.”

“I’m sorry that I worried you. I’m so happy for you and Kevin. Having Aaron is the best thing that ever happened to me. I want you both to have something that special, too,” Justin said, once again choking up with emotion.

“Jus, what’s wrong? From everything you’ve told me I would think that you’d be happier, but something caused you to call me this morning. Tell me what’s wrong,” Dani insisted.

Justin took a deep breath before telling his friend his darkest secret. “Dan, do you remember back in our senior year when I was spending so much time in New York? You kept asking me if I was seeing someone, but I never really gave you a straight answer. The truth was that I did meet someone. He was beautiful and smart and God, I loved him so much. We were together for about a year and I knew I met the one for me. The problem was that he didn’t believe in love. He kept telling me not to count on him for anything. He had a career to launch and told me he didn’t have time for attachments. I figured that in time he’d realize how wrong he was. That one day he’d wake up and see that we were meant to be together. Then one night I went to him to tell him about my acceptance at SVA. Before I even got a chance he told me it was over. He said that we had our fun but that was it time to say goodbye. I was devastated. I pleaded with him, trying to get him to see how good we were together, but he wouldn’t listen. That was the night my parents kicked me out.” Justin stopped talking as he remembered the night his whole life fell apart.

“Oh Justin, why didn’t you tell me?” Dani asked as tears began to run down her cheeks. Her heart went out to her friend for all the pain he suffered in silence.

“I don’t know. At first I wanted to keep it a secret because I was sure you’d disapprove. I didn’t know him that well and he was older than me. I figured that if I said anything you’d just tell me to forget him. Then, after we broke up, well I was so depressed that I couldn’t talk about it. You just assumed that it was my parents that had me so upset, and they were a part of it, but not the whole reason. I was a fool to let myself fall in love with him in the first place. I guess I just thought I deserved what I got. So instead I threw myself into school and got on with my life. It wasn’t easy, but I eventually met Wyatt and things seemed to get better. I never forgot about the other guy, but at least I had someone to love me.”

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that but I’m a little confused. What does your first love have to do with why you’re so upset now?”

“It was Brian,” Justin replied softly.

“What? What do you mean it was Brian?” Dani shrieked.

“Shhh…you’ll wake up Kevin and Aaron,” Justin said, trying to shush her. “Brian was the guy I fell for. I never knew his last name. I know that sounds ridiculous, but it’s true. I guess that was his way of trying to keep things uncomplicated between us. We hardly ever went to his apartment because of his roommate. We always met up out somewhere. It never seemed to come up. When Wyatt and I moved in together, his parents insisted that we join them for dinner one night so they could meet me. Imagine my surprise when I found that Brian Kinney was my Brian. I was horrified. Brian left it up to me whether or not we told Wyatt about us, and I decided not to. I knew that he loved me…and I loved him. I didn’t want to hurt him by telling him that his brother was the one who broke the heart he was trying to mend. It took some time but we eventually got past the awkwardness and never mentioned the past again. We actually became friends and it was nice. I won’t lie to you. There hasn’t been a day since I met him that I didn’t think about him, but I loved Wyatt and wanted to make him happy. If Wyatt was still alive, nothing would’ve ever happened between Brian and me again.”

“Oh no…don’t tell me,” Dani groaned as she began putting two and two together. “Please tell me nothing happened between you two.”

“I wish I could,” Justin whispered. He took another deep breath and told her all about what was going on between them, from Brian’s blaming him for his brother’s death up until the night before when they had sex in the living room. By the time he was done, those damn tears were back again. “Dan, I don’t know what to do now.”

“God, you still love him, don’t you?” she asked quietly.

“With all my heart. Shit, why is this happening to me? He broke my heart once and I let him do it again. You should’ve seen how upset he was by what happened last night. He couldn’t wait to get as far away from me as he could. I heard him take off as soon as I went upstairs and he hadn’t made it back by the time I left for the airport. I don’t know what to do. Why do I always manage to screw things up where Brian’s concerned?”

Dani reached out and took her friend in her arms, wishing she had the answers he needed.

Brian finally ventured home late that night, relieved that no one was downstairs when he walked in. He tossed his jacket on the couch and headed right for the bar. The couple of drinks he had earlier weren’t nearly enough to stop him from thinking of Justin. How had he managed to screw things up so bad once again? It was bad enough that he broke the kid’s heart so long ago, but why did he have to take advantage of him now, right when he was trying to put his life back together? His self loathing had been eating at him ever since he pulled out of Justin the night before, making it almost impossible for him to sleep. By the time he rolled out of bed that morning he knew he wouldn’t be ready to face Justin so he spent the day walking around Central Park trying to find a way to apologize to the blond. When he finally realized that there were no words to make up for what he had done, he headed to the Duplex; a place he had avoided since his earlier days with Justin. Maybe it was the need for self torture, but he sat in the corner nursing his drink and thinking about how important Justin had been to him when they were first together.

Shit, to that day Brian had never cared about another man the way he cared for Justin. While Wyatt had been in the picture, Brian had little trouble putting Justin behind him. He was his brother’s partner and his nephew’s daddy. But now; now that Brian knew that Wyatt didn’t deserve Justin’s love, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. In the last eight months, his mind had been way too occupied with thoughts of both past and present. He hadn’t planned on doing anything about it. He lived with his feeling buried inside him for ten years. There was no reason he couldn’t continue on as he had been. But that was before his mother told him about Justin’s date. Anger suddenly surfaced, making it almost impossible to breathe. How fair was that? Justin deserved to be happy and he sure hadn’t been willing to do anything about it. Or was he? Could he let out his true feelings after keeping them inside for so long? And would his feelings even matter to Justin, or were they ten years too late?

Brian heard the sound of someone coming down the stairs and shook his head to rid himself of his thoughts. He looked up from where he was standing and saw his mother walking through the door.

“Brian, where have you been? We expected you home this morning,” Joan said as she looked at her son, noticing the dark circles under his eyes. The ones that matched Justin’s that morning.

“I’m sorry Mom. Here I thought I was an adult and old enough to do what I wanted without parental permission,” Brian replied sarcastically, earning a glare from his mother.

“Don’t be fresh. It’s just that Aaron wanted to say goodbye before he left and was a little disappointed that you weren’t here,” she explained.

“Left? Where did he go?” Brian asked, suddenly feeling a tightening in his chest. Justin was gone?

“He and Justin flew to Texas this morning to visit Dani and Kevin.”

He went to Dani’s? That wasn’t a good sign. Justin hadn’t spoken to Dani since the services. Regardless of how irrational it was, he was still upset with her for going to Jack and Joan behind his back. How did this spur of the moment trip come about? Somehow Brian had a feeling he knew.

Joan watched a mixture of emotions pass Brian’s features which confirmed her suspicions. Brian was somehow behind Justin’s departure. “Brian, what’s going on?”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“Look Brian, I’m not stupid. A blind man could see that there’s more going on with you and Justin than you’re letting on. I noticed it the day Wyatt brought him home to meet us.” Joan held up her hand, stopping Brian from his immediate denial. “Save it. I’m not buying it anymore. Just talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”

Brian bit back his denial and plopped down in the nearest chair with a sigh. “I don’t know where to start.”

“Why don’t you start with when you and Justin met?” Joan encouraged as she sat down opposite him.

“It was right before my senior year at NYU,” Brian admitted.

“But…Justin could’ve only been…”

“He was seventeen. I found him at the Duplex. He was getting ready to accept a drink from the biggest sleaze on the scene. I saw how innocent he was and had to stop him before he got hurt. He ended up leaving. I think I scared him with my bluntness, but someone had to warn him about the ugliness of the bars. I should’ve let him go, but there was something about him. I just couldn’t, so I followed him out to the street,” Brian paused as he thought back to the night. “I took him home with me.”

“Okay, so you had a one night stand with him.” Joan saw the shocked look on Brian’s face and couldn’t help but laugh. “Please Brian, you’re my son. I’m not blind to your ways. Now what happened after that?”

“It was more than a one night stand. We were together for almost a year,” Brian admitted softly.

“What? How come we never knew about it? Brian, I’ve never known you to have a relationship with anybody. Why didn’t you bring him here to meet us?”

“Because I was too busy trying to convince myself that he didn’t mean anything to me. God, I was so stupid. He was the only person I ever fu…I mean spent more than one night with, yet I was sure that he meant nothing. It was just for fun.”

“How did Justin feel about it?” Joan asked, although she had a feeling that she already knew.

“You know how Justin is. He thought he was in love with me. At first I thought he’d get over it so I let it go, but then I heard him telling someone in the bar that he was waiting for his acceptance to SVA so he didn’t have to travel back and forth so much. I knew then that he was looking for a future with me. I couldn’t let him do that. I was getting ready to graduate and start my career. The last thing I needed was some lovesick kid distracting me. So I pushed him away. That was the last time I saw him until Wyatt brought him home.”

“Okay, so why didn’t you tell your brother? It happened years before they met?”

“I don’t know. I saw such fear in Justin’s eyes that night. I knew he didn’t want Wyatt to know so I left it up to him. He chose to keep it a secret,” Brian replied. “I tried talking to him that night, but he was still so upset with me. I figured he would’ve been over it by then, but he wasn’t. Eventually we put it behind us and were able to get along for Wyatt’s sake. All I wanted was for my brother to be happy, and Justin gave that to him. He also got what he wanted out of Wyatt. A loving partner.” Brian almost choked on the words, but he didn’t want to let his mother know what Wyatt had done to Justin. Wyatt was gone and there was no reason for his own parents to know what an asshole he turned out to be at Justin’s expense.

“So what happened last night?” Joan asked, once again surprising her son.

“Last night?”

“Let’s see, Justin goes out on a date. One he was really excited about. The next thing we know Justin gets up looking like he’d been through the wringer after having another sleepless night and tells us he’s flying to see his friend. The one who he hasn’t spoken to in eight months. You disappear for an entire day and come home to drown your sorrows looking almost as bad as he does. So again, what happened last night?” Joan prodded.

“I’m not sure. When you told me he was out with that Drew guy I got pissed. I know it’s irrational, but I was so mad that he was actually out on a date. I was in here when he got home. I ended up putting my foot in my mouth and said some things that I shouldn’t have said,” Brian admitted.

“And?” Joan waited for a response and when she didn’t get one, she continued. “It took more than a fight with you to send him running to Dani. What happened?”

“I’m not sure this is something I want to discuss with my mother,” was Brian’s reply.

“So I take it you slept with him?”

Brian was shocked by his mother’s bluntness. “Uh…yeah…something like that.”

“Well what was said between you after that?”

“I told him to go to bed.”

“You didn’t talk about it?” Joan asked incredulously.

“Mom, we’re fags. We don’t lie in the afterglow and talk about our feelings,” Brian replied sarcastically.

“Brian, when are you going to stop hiding behind your sexuality? Just because you favor men over women doesn’t mean you’re not capable of caring about someone and having a real relationship. Christ, stop being such a coward,” Joan demanded.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s better this way. Justin deserves to be happy and I can’t give him that.”

“Can’t or won’t? All Justin really needs is someone to love him and he’s already got that,” Joan stated.

“I don’t…”

“I told you, I’m not buying it anymore. I think it’s about time you admitted to yourself just how much Justin means to you and do something about it. You’ve already wasted ten years. Don’t you think that’s enough?”

“Why are you doing this? Why are you trying to push me into taking Wyatt’s place?”

“The way I see it, it was the other way around. Wyatt took your place and it’s time for you to reclaim it. I loved your brother very much, but I know he wasn’t always the best for Justin.” At Brian’s startled expression, Joan went on. “I know all about Colin. Wyatt had to talk to someone and he figured his mother was the only one he could trust. What they had wasn’t nearly as special as what he had with Justin, but there was definitely something going on between them. It killed me to know what he was doing behind Justin’s back, but it wasn’t my place to betray my son.”

“Why did he do it, Mom? How could he hurt Justin like that?” Brian asked, needing to know the answer to the question that had been plaguing him for so many months.

“He was weak, I guess. He always felt inferior to Justin. His writing was getting better, but he always felt so talent less when he was with Justin. Colin boosted his ego. He was an editor but he didn’t have your brother’s creativity or talent. Instead he admired Wyatt for what he could do. It was supposed to be a brief fling, but Colin was a sick man. When Wyatt tried to tell him that they couldn’t see each other anymore, Colin went crazy. He began following them every time Justin and Wyatt went out. One day they were at the gallery and Wyatt excused himself to use the phone to call his office. When he came back, Colin was there holding Aaron and talking to Justin. Obviously Justin had no idea who he was, but just seeing this crazy person holding his son scared the hell out of Wyatt. He met Colin that night and tried to reason with him, but the guy was delusional. He threatened to hurt the people who were keeping them apart. He meant Justin and Aaron. I begged Wyatt to go to the police, but he was just so scared. Instead he agreed to carry on their affair and hoped that Colin would get tired of him.”

“Why didn’t he just tell Justin the truth?”

“He was terrified of losing him. He figured that Justin wouldn’t forgive him and he didn’t want to lose his family. I think I finally had him convinced to move back here and get out of Vermont, but then the fire happened. He never got the chance to fix things.” Joan wiped at her eyes as the tears started rolling down her cheeks. “You see Brian, life is too short. You have to go after what you want before it’s too late. I love Justin like he’s my own son and you know how I feel about you. I want you both to be happy in life and if you can have that together, then I’m behind you all the way. It’s too late for Wyatt, but it’s not too late for you. Goodnight son.”

Joan kissed Brian’s cheek before heading back to bed, leaving Brian with so many thoughts running through his head. Maybe Wyatt wasn’t the person he thought he was, but he couldn’t help but feel bad for the fear he lived with during his last days. He wished that his brother had come to him with his problems. Things would’ve turned out so different if he did. But it was too late. Like his mother said, life was too short. Wyatt didn’t have the chance to make things right, but maybe Brian did. Maybe Brian could fix the things in his life before a twist of fate took away everything he held dear. He reached for the phone before he had enough time to talk himself out of it and dialed Justin’s cell phone number. It rang twice before he heard the soft voice that haunted his dreams.

“Hello?”

“Hey, it’s me,” Brian said softly, his heart trying to beat its way out of his chest.

“Brian?” Justin replied, fear gripping him. “What’s wrong? Is it your dad?”

“No…it’s nothing like that. Everyone’s fine,” Brian assured him.

“Oh…okay. Well then…uh…why are you calling?” Justin asked in confusion. Brian was the last person he expected to hear from.

“I…wanted to…no, needed to tell you something,” Brian replied.

Justin held his breath as he waited for Brian to continue, but when he didn’t hear anything, he became concerned. “Brian? Is everything alright?”

“I love you, Justin,” Brian blurted out before he lost his nerve. “I guess I always have, but I was too much of an ass to admit it. I’m sorry that I waited so long to tell you, but after talking to my mother I knew that I couldn’t wait any longer. I’ll understand if it’s too late, but I’m really hoping that you still love me, too.”

Justin sat with the phone to his ear, trying to stop the tears that started pouring down his face. After ten years, Brian was finally telling him what he’d been waiting to hear. It was what he’d been hoping for ever since he was seventeen and hearing it now wiped away the sorrow that he’d been feeling ever since the night before. He couldn’t seem to find his voice to tell Brian that it wasn’t too late. That he’d wait forever if it meant that they’d be together one day.

“Justin…say something. Tell me it’s not too late. Tell me you still love me. Hell, tell me to go fuck myself. Just say something,” Brian pleaded as he waited for a response.

“I’ll…be home…as soon as I can,” Justin replied tearfully.

“Does that mean…”

“God, I love you so much. I’ve just been waiting for you to realize that you love me, too,” Justin assured him.

“I guess I’m a little slow at these thing,” Brian laughed as relief washed over him.

“Yeah, you are. You’re going to have to work on that,” Justin teased.

“I will. I promise,” Brian told him as he vowed to himself to keep his promise. Even if it took him the rest of his life.

By the time Justin stepped off the plane in New York the following day, his fear was threatening to consume him. He’d been having doubts ever since hanging up with Brian the night before. What if he changed his mind? What if he thought about it some more and decided that Justin wasn’t what he wanted? So many thoughts were running through his head and it took everything he had to keep him from turning around and heading back to Texas. Dani had assured him that Brian wouldn’t have called if he wasn’t ready to move forward with their relationship, but that didn’t seem to help ease his nervous. He led Aaron to baggage claim and grabbed their bags before making their way outside. Brian had promised to pick them up, but Justin didn’t see any sign of him. As his panic set in, he felt a gentle hand touch him on the shoulder. He spun around and came face to face with Brian, but all he could do was stare at him as his ability to speak suddenly disappeared.

“What’s the matter, Sunshine? Cat got your tongue?” Brian teased.

“Uncle Brian, I missed you,” Aaron exclaimed as he threw himself at his uncle.

“I missed you, too munchkin. How was Aunt Dani and Uncle Kevin?” Brian asked as he focused on his nephew.

“Good, but Aunt Dani got fat?” Aaron replied innocently.

Brian looked at Justin questioningly, waiting for an explanation.

“She’s…uh…pregnant. The baby’s due in July,” Justin explained.

“Ah, I see. Good for them. So what do you say we get out of here?” Brian asked as he picked up Aaron and started making his way to the car.

Justin followed him in silence, a little unsure of how to react. Brian hadn’t done anything to suggest that they were anything more than friends except for the return of his former nickname. Not that he expected to be thrown down on the sidewalk and ravished, but a little display of affection would’ve made him feel a lot better. When they reached the car, Brian popped open the trunk so Justin could put their bags inside while he opened the back door and buckled Aaron in his car seat. As Justin slammed the trunk closed, he felt himself being spun around and pushed up against the car as a warm mouth came down on his. The kiss was more passionate than anything Justin had experienced and he barely had time to react before he felt himself being let go.

“Sorry about that. I figured it would be better for Aaron if he got used to us being together slowly, but I knew I couldn’t wait until he was in bed to kiss you,” Brian explained as he took in Justin’s stunned expression.

It took Justin a minute to comprehend what Brian was saying, but once he did he smiled brightly. Brian hadn’t changed his mind. They really were finally going to be together. “You don’t ever have to apologize for kissing me.”

Brian smiled back at him. “Are you ready to go home, Sunshine?”

“Oh yeah, let’s go home.”


The end
11/06/05

Return to Something to Prove