Love Conquers All

Part 3

Ethan looked like someone had slapped him in the face, and in all reality, Brian just did. The room had an eerie silence before the doctor spoke up.

“Well, let me get to my rounds. Brian, as long as you're up to it and have worked out the problems we've discussed, I’ll have you out of here by tomorrow. Let me know if you need anything else." With that, the doctor left the three men alone. As he walked passed the nurses station he grabbed one of the aids and said, "Keep an eye on Mr. Kinney's room. If you hear anyone raising their voice, call security."

“Yes Doctor,” the aid replied looking at the room uncomfortably.

The three men looked at each other but no one was really sure what to say. Justin spoke up first.

"Ethan, why don't we go get that dinner you wanted? I'll explain everything then."

As Justin led Ethan from the room, he made eye contact with Brian and the look on the older man’s face made Justin's heart soar. It was a look that seemed to say 'don't worry, we're in this together!'

Ethan still wasn't talking as they left the hospital and headed to the Diner. Justin was starting to get worried. He may not love Ethan, but he did care about him and he didn't want to cause him any more pain. Everything was getting so complicated. Justin was throwing away his relationship with Ethan to watch over Brian while he recovered, but then what? Brian already admitted that he didn't love Justin, and that he won't allow himself to love him. 'Well, I can't think about that right now. I need to figure out what to say to Ethan,' Justin thought to himself.

As the two men took a seat in one of the booths, Justin tried to think of what he was going to say. He looked around in relief, thankful that none of the gang was there. That would just have made things even harder.

Ethan spoke up first. "Justin, do you want to tell me what Brian was talking about? He can't be serious. You aren't actually thinking about moving back in there with him, are you?"

Justin took a deep breath before answering. "I'm really sorry you had to find out that way, but yes, I’m moving in with him again. But it's not what you think. He needs constant care right now. He can't be left alone for long periods of time. He needs me."

Ethan could not believe what he was hearing. He felt Justin slipping away, and he couldn't allow that to happen. Ever since he saw Justin sketching him during his concert, he knew that he wanted this man. And Ethan had to work very hard to get him away from Brian, but in the end, he had won. He was not going to let anything split them up; especially Brian. But Ethan wasn't stupid. He knew if he pushed too hard, Brian would in this round. He had to take it easy.

"Justin," Ethan began. "I understand that you feel responsible for what happened, but you can't disrupt your life on a whim. You have obligations and things going on that you can't walk away from. What about school?"

Justin started to squirm a little, knowing what he was about to do, but he didn't have a choice. He was going to be there for Brian, no matter what. He would worry about the rest later. As far as disrupting his life, what kind of life was he going to have without Brian in it? They’d been apart for six months and he'd been more miserable them ever. Justin couldn't pretend anymore. He may not have Brian's love, but he could at least have his friendship.

"I'm not worried about school. It's still early. I'll just withdrawal and start again next semester. I haven't put that much time in anyway. I haven't found a job yet so there’s no problem there. In fact, maybe I could get my old job back here. This way I can arrange for someone to help out with Brian while I'm working. I'm sure Deb can help out. I'm really sorry if this hurts you. I'll understand if it's too much for you to handle. I don't expect you to wait for me."

Justin let out the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. At least now the problem with Ethan had been handled. Or so Justin thought. He was shocked by what came next.

"Justin, what are you talking about? Of course I'll wait for you. I love you. I'm not happy about the situation, but it's not worth throwing away all that we have. I'll be here for you. We can't let Brian's accident come between us."

As Ethan spoke, he felt bile rise up in his throat. The thought of Justin living with Brian made him see red, but until a better solution was available, he had to just go with what he had. Once Brian started to recover, Ethan would get Justin back where he wanted him. Until then, Ethan had to keep his cool and be extra sensitive to Justin's needs.

‘Ethan was willing to wait for me? He wanted to keep the relationship going, even with me living at the loft?’ Justin thought to himself. 'Now what am I suppose to do? This was going to be my way out. Now he wants to pretend that nothing is wrong. I need to put a stop to this right now.'

But before Justin got a chance to put his thoughts into action, Michael walked in. When he saw Justin and Ethan in the corner Michael went over and sat down next to Ethan. As he looked across the table at Justin he felt the tension in the air.

"Hey Boy Wonder, how's Brian doing? I haven't made it over to see him yet. The store has been pretty crazy lately," Michael said, trying to ease some of the tension.

Ethan was the first one to reply. "Well, maybe if you paid more attention to your friend, he wouldn't need to have Justin by his bedside. You should be the one putting your life on hold. Excuse me, I have to go."

As Michael got out of Ethan's way, he saw the confused look on Justin's face. Michael knew something was going on. He just didn't know what it was.

Ethan leaned over and kissed Justin goodbye. "Justin, do what you have to do. I’ll be here when you're done. Call me later and let me know your plans. I'll pack some of your stuff for you. And remember, I love you." Then Ethan walked out of the Diner.

Justin was confused. He wasn't sure what was going to happen next, but he was thankful for some time alone to think about things. Well, he thought he had some time alone.

"Okay, Boy Wonder, what's going on?" Michael had no intention of going anywhere until he got to the bottom of things.

"Look," Justin started. "Everything's okay. Brian has a blood clot at the base of his spine that’s causing his paralysis. He's on medication to dissolve it. Until then, he needs to be taken care of. He can't be living alone."

"Okay. I'll close down the store for a while. It’ll be pretty rough since I'm just starting to get the store off the ground, but if Brian needs me, I'll be there." Michael replied, always ready to help when it came to Brian.

"It's okay. I've already agreed to move in with him and take care of him until he's better."

"Can you get away right now? There seems to be a lot of tension between you and Ethan. And what about school?" Michael asked.

Justin was tired of answering everyone's questions. "I’ll take care of it. Don't worry; I’ll be there for Brian, for as long as he needs me to be. Listen Michael; I need to get back to the hospital. I'll talk to you later." And with that, Justin got up and walked out of the Diner.

Michael was left to sit back and wonder what was going on. There was no doubt in Michael's mind that Justin would be there for Brian. The question was what was going to happen when Brian didn't need help anymore. Michael didn't want to see the two men hurt each other anymore. "I just hope they can find a way to work things out this time," he said to no one in particular.

Once Justin got back to the hospital, he took a few minutes to clear his head before going into Brian's room. As soon as he saw Brian lying in bed, he knew there was no other place he would rather be. Brian was asleep, so Justin sat down by the bed and thought about all that happened in the last four days. He still wasn't sure why Brian was at PIFA in the first place, or what caused his change of heart when deciding to let Justin move in. So many things had changed in the last few days, thinking about it all was starting to give Justin a headache, so he just sat back and closed his eyes. He was asleep in minutes.

 

The next morning, Brian awoke to see Justin sound asleep in the chair next to the bed. Brian was once again stunned by the boy's beauty. Thinking back to the first time he saw Justin, standing under the streetlight, Brian remembered how beautiful he was. It was a slow night and Brian was getting ready to leave when he saw Justin leaning against the light post. It was as if Brian was being pulled to the boy. He knew he had to have him. Brian never felt anything like that before or since. The feelings actually scared Brian. He never felt so out of control in his life. Even now, Justin caused Brian to feel things he didn't want to feel. 'It can't be love. I don't believe in love.' Brian's thoughts were interrupted when Justin woke up. The two men looked at each other, waiting for the other to say something. Justin spoke first.

"Hey, how’re you feeling?"

Brian wasn't sure how to respond. Physically, he was feeling pretty good. Mentally he was feeling things that he never felt before and didn't know what to do about it. Of course he wasn't going to share his thoughts with Justin. At least not yet. Brian knew that if he was ever going to get Justin back where he belonged he was going to have to open up a little and let him in. He just wasn't sure if he was ready to do that yet.

"I feel pretty good, I guess, considering the circumstances. Why are you here? I thought you left with Ian. I didn't really expect to see you again." Brian said.

“First of all, his name is Ethan. And of course I'm here. I told you I'm gonna be here for you for as long as you need me to be. Did you think I would back out? Was that why you dropped your little bomb on Ethan last night? Because you figured I would be forced to choose and would have chosen to go home with Ethan?” Justin was starting to lose his temper.

"Why not?" Brian replied. “You chose Ethan last time.”

Justin sat there looking at Brian in shock. He thought he actually saw pain in Brian's eyes, but it disappeared so fast the Justin wasn't sure if he imagined it.

"Brian, we never got a chance to talk about what happened at the party. I'm sorry." Justin stopped when Brian held up his hand.

"Hey. Sorry is bullshit. You did what you had to do. There’s no need to feel bad about it. There were no locks on our doors. That was the deal, remember? The only person you’re responsible for is yourself." Brian stopped talking as he saw the doctor walk in.

"Good morning gentlemen. How’re you feeling this morning Mr. Kinney? Are you ready to get out of here?" The doctor already knew the answer, before he even asked the question. "Your discharge has been completed. All you have to do is sign here and you’re free to go. Just remember, you have to let someone help you, and I need to see you regularly. Do we have a deal?"

Brian would’ve agreed to anything right at that moment. All he wanted to do was to go home to his own bed. "Yes Doctor. We have a deal. I promise to be a good boy."

Justin couldn't help but giggle. "Ha, that is something I would like to see." He couldn't help himself. Brian Kinney, a good boy? Justin had his doubts, but kept the rest of his thoughts to himself.

"Brian, I'm going to call Lindsey to come get us. Her car is probably the best one to get you home," Justin said before leaving to go make the call.

As the doctor turned to leave, he stopped and gave Brian one final thought before walking out the door. "Mr. Kinney. I may be out of line here, and I obviously don't know the story between you two, I just know what I see. And I see two men who are so much in love but are, for some reason, not together. Take it from someone who experiences how short life is everyday. Make the most of it. Go after what you want. Chances are, you'll never regret it."

The doctor disappeared through the door leaving Brian to sit in bed thinking about what is was that he wanted. "Justin…I want Justin," he said out loud before pushing the call button. When the nurse appeared, he said, "Could you help me get ready? I have a life I need to go after."

When Justin got back to the room, Brian was dressed and in his wheelchair, ready to go. But the look on his face stopped Justin in his tracks. Knowing him so well, Justin knew exactly what was going through Brian's head.

"Don't worry Brian. This is only temporary. You’ll be walking in no time."

Brian was startled by how Justin knew exactly what he was feeling, but he didn't want Justin to know he was right. "I'm not worried. Nothing can keep Brian Kinney down. I'll be fucking before you know it," he said with a lot more confidence then he felt.

Justin let it go. Now was not the time to push. "Lindsey is on her way. Let's get out of here."

As Justin went to push the wheelchair, Brian grabbed him by the arm. "I'm not an invalid. My arms still work. I can get myself out of here!"

Justin quietly followed Brian down the hallway, thinking about what he was in for. Brian was an independent man who now has to rely on others to do simple everyday things. "What did I get myself into?" Justin mumbled.

"What?" Brian asked.

"Nothing, I was just wondering what I was going to make for dinner." Justin replied, praying to God he had the energy it was going to take to help Brian get through the days ahead.


End of part 3

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