Coming Out

Chapter 18

Brian woke up in Justin’s arms and a wave of happiness washed over him. Looking at the clock, he noticed that it was almost five and knew they needed to get up before Jennifer came home. The last thing he wanted was for her to find them in bed together. As he was thinking of creative ways to wake up his lover, he heard a knock at the door.

“Brian, Justin! Dinner is almost ready. Time to get up!” Jennifer called, smiling at the thought of the boy’s reaction to being caught. She walked back downstairs laughing all the way.

“Fuck!” Brian exclaimed, looking over to confirm that he had forgotten to lock the door earlier. He climbed out of bed, getting dressed as quickly as he could. He wasn’t sure if he was more scared or embarrassed by the thought of Jennifer catching them, but he knew he didn’t want to have to face her alone. He was going to drag his Sunshine out of bed.

“Hey, where are you going?” Justin asked sleepily, unaware that Jennifer had come to the door.

“Justin, you have to get up. You mother is home. She knocked on the door and knows we’re in here together,” Brian explained as he threw Justin his clothes. He couldn’t help the feeling of dread he was experiencing. It was one thing for Jennifer to know that they were together; it was another for her to find them together.

“What do you mean she knows we’re together? Did she see us? What does she know?” Justin asked in a panic. Jumping out of bed, he quickly started getting dressed, his heart beating out of his chest. He’d been so happy that his mother was understanding when it came to his being gay and loving Brian, but he wasn‘t so sure how she would react to them sleeping together in the house.

“I don’t know what she knows. I was sleeping when she knocked on the door, but she called out to both of us, knowing we were in here together,” Brian replied, watching Justin as he fumbled with his clothes. He couldn’t help the tightening in his groin and cursed himself for getting hard at this particular moment. ‘God, the things Justin can do to me just by looking at him’ Brian thought to himself.

“That doesn’t mean she knows what we were doing, Brian. Maybe you’re just overreacting,” Justin offered, hoping that he was right. Brian had been paranoid since he moved in so maybe things weren’t as bad as he was making them out to be.

“Justin she knew we were sleeping…” Brian explained not wanting to tell the rest. He felt terrible about forgetting to lock the door. This was all his fault and he could tell by the looking at Justin that his guilt was obviously showing on his face.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Justin asked, taking in the guilty look on Brian’s face. Something else was going on and he wanted to know what it was before going downstairs to face his mother.

“I…uh…I forgot to lock the door. I think she might have come in here. How else would she know we were sleeping?” Brian admitted softly, staring down at the floor. He didn’t want to see the look in Justin’s eyes. It’s was one thing for Jennifer to find him in an uncomfortable situation, he wasn’t her son. Justin had been so worried about his mother finding out he was gay. Brian could only imagine how he would feel if she had walked in and found them naked in bed.

“Oh…okay…uh, that’s…”Justin tried to say something but his brain wasn’t working properly. He couldn’t believe he’d forgotten to lock the door. He had been so overwhelmed by Brian’s admissions; he forgot everything else around him. He finished getting dressed and was reaching for the door when Brian stopped him.

“I’m so sorry, Justin. I should have made sure I locked the door when I came in here before. This is all my fault,” Brian mumbled, feeling so bad that he had caused the fear and uncertainty he saw in Justin’s eyes.

“Oh God, Brian. This isn’t your fault. I should’ve thought about the door, too. Look, we messed up. Let’s just go downstairs and see what happens. Maybe it won’t be that bad. I mean, my mother has been great about everything so far, and I’m sure she knows that we’re sleeping together. We are seventeen years old for God sakes. What else would we be doing?” Justin smiled, trying to reassure both Brian and himself. Whatever happens, they would face it together. As long as he had Brian by his side he could face anything.

Brian leaned in and gave Justin a soft kiss before taking him by the hand and leading him downstairs.

Jennifer was in the kitchen taking dinner out of the oven when the boys walked in. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw how happy the boys seemed to be and couldn’t help but be thankful that they were able to work things out. No one knew for sure if the boys would grow to live happily ever after, but she recognized the signs of love. They looked at each other like her and Craig still looked at each other and Jennifer couldn’t be happier for her son.

“Well, it’s about time you two got out of bed,” she said with a twinkle in her eye. Jennifer could see a look of fear cross their faces and knew that they had figured out that they had been caught. Since she had walked in and seen them together she had spent her time thinking about what to say to the boys. She wasn’t stupid enough to think that they weren’t doing things, but she felt that she needed to say something to them about what was appropriate in the house. She couldn’t just let them do what they wanted. They were only seventeen and the only reason Brian was living there was because of the situation with his parents. Otherwise, she never would have allowed them to live together at their age. Also, there was the problem of Craig not knowing. She didn’t even want to think about what might’ve happened if he was the one who walked in on them instead of her.

“Mom, listen…we…” Justin stammered, glancing at Brian for support. He didn’t know what to say, but was stopped from speaking when Jennifer started talking again.

“Boys, let’s get dinner on the table and then we can discuss what I…uh…saw earlier,” she said, uncomfortable with having to have the discussion at all. She wasn’t normally an interfering mother and always prided herself in letting her children have their own space, but this was unusual circumstances and she needed to step in.

Brian and Justin quietly helped her get dinner on the table and they all filled their plates before the discussion began.

“Okay boys; just let me say what I have to say because I know this is uncomfortable for all of us. First of all, I want to say that I’m not really mad by what happened. I understand you two love each other and I’m happy you were able to work things out, but we do need to set some kind of ground rules. Brian is here because he needed a safe place to live, not to live with his boyfriend. I was seventeen once and I know what it’s like to want to be with the person you love, but you two will have to do what other teens do and find some dark corner by the lake to spend that time. It’s not appropriate for you to be…doing things…here. What if I was your father or sister? I want you to act as if Brian doesn’t live here. I don’t care if you hold each other’s hands while watching TV, but you need to refrain from locking yourselves in the bedroom. There’s not a mother in her right mind that would let their child behave that way in their home, gay or straight. Do you understand?” Jennifer asked, hoping she was making some sense. She always assumed she would catch her son with a girl one day and be able to throw the problem at Craig to handle so she wasn’t prepared for this. She saw that each one looked guilty and knew that they understood what she was saying.

“I’m sorry, Jennifer. You’re right. My mother always told Claire that if she wanted to have boys in her room, she had to leave the door open. I guess I never thought of it that way,” Brian said.

“Yeah Mom, I’m sorry, too. I didn’t think about it either. We won’t let it happen again. We’ll leave the door open from now on if you want us to,” Justin offered, knowing how lucky he was that she was so understanding. The last thing he wanted to do was to upset her.

“You don’t have to leave the door open. You just need to follow the rules and I trust that you will. Just remember what would happen if your father finds out what is going on. I’m not sure how he would react to you being gay, but I can just imagine his reaction to Brian living here. I hate keeping this from him, but I think for the time being it’s the best thing to do. He’s going to have to find out eventually, but I think it would be better if he was told, rather then to walk in on the two of you. Don’t you agree?” She asked with a smile.

“Yeah, I think telling him would definitely be better,” Justin laughed, feeling better about what had happened earlier. He found himself once again thanking God for having a mother like Jennifer.

After dinner, Brian and Justin did the dishes while Jennifer ran to the video store to rent some movies. The three of them were going to lounge around the living room eating popcorn and watching movies. While Justin was washing the dishes, Brian came up behind him and wrapped his arms around the boy’s waist.

“You have no idea how happy I am at this moment. For the last week I’ve spent every minute wondering how I was going to live without you. Thank you for being patient with me and for taking me back after I was such an ass to you,” Brian said, as he kissed Justin’s neck. All he wanted to do was take Justin upstairs and make love to him, but he wouldn’t go back on his promise to Jennifer. She trusted them and after all she had done for him, there was no way he was going to break that trust.

“Bri, you don’t have to thank me. I love you and would do anything for you. I would’ve waited forever to have you back here with me. Just do me a favor. The next time something is bothering you, come talk to me. Don’t try to push me away for my own good. I’m strong and I can withstand anything as long as you’re beside me,” Justin replied softly as he turned around and pressed his lips to Brian’s in a warm kiss. He felt Brian part his lips and took the invitation as he plunged his tongue into his warm mouth. He took pleasure in being the aggressor and pushed Brian up against the refrigerator, rubbing his aching groin against Brian’s as he attacked his mouth. His mind was reeling from the heat radiating between them and he knew he had to pull back before they broke their promise and went at it on the kitchen floor. As he pulled back he looked up into lust filled eyes and asked the question that had been plaguing him for weeks.

“Brian, have you ever bottomed for anyone before?”

Brian was taken back by the question and looked deep into Justin’s face, knowing what the boy was getting at. “No. I’ve never let anyone top me.” He replied, waiting for the next question to come.

“Do you think that maybe…” Justin started only to be stopped by Brian’s words.

“I would love to have you inside of me,” Brian whispered, taking Justin lips for another heated kiss. Although he was never willing to give up control to another person, he knew that bottoming for Justin wouldn’t be giving up control, it would be sharing his heart and the thought made him quiver in anticipation. He would give Justin anything he asked for as love as he got the boy’s love in return. The boys jumped at the sound of the front door being opened signaling Jennifer’s return. They went back to what they were doing, trying to catch their breath as they did.

“Brian, Justin…I’m back. Get the popcorn started while I go change. I’ll meet you in the living room in fifteen minutes,” Jennifer called from the other room.

“I can’t wait to get you into one of those dark corners by the lake,” Justin whispered to Brian so his mother wouldn’t hear.

“I can’t wait for that either, Sunshine,” Brian whispered back, knowing that the wait would be worth it.


End of part 18
7/25/03

Return to Coming Out