No More Mio Amore

Chapter 22 “Amore”

"The finest inheritance you can give to a child is to allow it to make its own way, completely on its own feet" - Isadora Duncan

 

****

Wednesday, August 30, 2000

“The carpet’s going to have to be replaced,” Brian spoke, the moment he opened the front door to the building that would house Kincyn Advertising Agency.

Cynthia made the notes on her pad and followed Brian. “What do you suggest? Tile or…”

“Wood,” Brian put in, “and not that laminate shit. I want something…”

“Light,” Cynthia finished.

“Yeah.” Brian looked over his shoulder and smiled at Cynthia. “Bamboo?”

“For this square footage?” Cynthia asked. “You want to spend that kind of money?”

“It’s durable and environmental,” Brian reminded her, walking into a large narrow room.

Cynthia giggled, “You? Environmental?”

“Oh shut up. Being environmental goes along with my minimalist taste for design,” Brian defended.

Cynthia pulled open the heavy drapes covering the dozen floor to ceiling windows that banked the back wall of what would become the art department.

Brian coughed and sputtered. “Jesus! Warn me next time!” He backed away from the spray of dust and slapped at his suit. “I just had this dry cleaned.”

“Which is so environmentally friendly,” Cynthia taunted. “Same with your designer wardrobe and the obscenely expensive furniture you own made with completely un-environmentally friendly materials.”

Brian grunted. “Whatever. But if you really are concerned about the cost, since this company is half yours than we can downgrade the flooring, but I won’t compromise on the furniture.”

Cynthia turned away from Brian and grinned evilly to herself; she loved fucking with Brian and his obsessive need to have the best of everything. “Our budget is fine, Brian. We don’t have to downgrade,” she told him, pushing a rickety desk chair to the side and walking to the front of the large room and opening the door to an office. “What do you want to put in here?”

Brian followed the woman into the office that looked as though it were a closet. It would have to be used as such. “There’s no way I’m putting anyone in here. There’s really no point; we haven’t talked about having a separate manger for the Art Department and other than you and me, everyone else we’ve hired will be equals. We’re not going to be big enough to need a Head for the Art Department, not yet anyway.”

Cynthia nodded in agreement. “So you want to use it as…?”

“There is only one window in here and it looks like one that should be in a bathroom,” Brian groaned. He eyed the desk wedged up against the back wall and the two file cabinets that flanked the doorway. “I have no idea how anyone could’ve worked in here.”

“Remember that we already had the cubicles out there removed,” Cynthia said and looked at the nameplate on the door. “Duke Lowery must’ve thought it was a step up from that.”

Brian shut off the light and squeezed past Cynthia and walked out of the double doors that closed off the Art Department’s area. “Have those removed; and as for that closet, make it a closet.”

“What next?” Cynthia asked, following Brian into the hallway.

“There’s so much to do,” Brian said a little overwhelmed. “I think we should hire a contractor and designer.”

“I think that’d be a good idea. But I have one more question before we leave here.”

“You’re ready to leave?” Brian asked. “I thought this was going to take hours. Debbie isn’t going to be happy when I pick Gus up after only an hour.”

Cynthia shrugged. “I’m sure that’d make you happy. But maybe you and I could go out for lunch. I have my laptop in my car and we can look through contacts for the contractor.”

“That’s fine and I already have a designer I’d like to use,” Brian started to walk toward the front door, jingling the keys as he went. “He’s the one who…”

“Alan Jules, the guy who designed your loft,” Cynthia interrupted. “You’ve hired him for some set designs too, remember? But before we left I wanted to ask about the daycare. Now that we’ve hired half of our employees we also know that only two of them besides you plan on making use of the center.”

“I don’t see the problem,” Brian said.

“Well I thought that because there will only be a few children, we might want to move it down to the basement level.”

Brian turned on his heel and walked toward the elevators. “You think there will be enough room down there?”

“Well if we’re hiring a contractor, I thought he could bust out the walls and maybe put in more windows. It looked like it was a pretty large space and there is already plumbing where we could put a bathroom next to the boiler room.”

Brian pressed the button for elevator and walked inside once it opened. “This thing needs to be fumigated. It smells like shit,” he muttered.

Cynthia held her nose and nodded. “The basement smells worse, remember?”

Brian laughed and pushed the B button. “And you want to put Gus down there?”

“We don’t need to go down there,” Cynthia said, holding out her arm so the doors wouldn’t close. She stepped out of the elevator. “Let’s decide on that once we get a contractor hired.”

Brian let out a deep breath as he followed his friend. “Pussy,” he teased.

Cynthia playfully pushed Brian’s arm and replied, “I just didn’t want to hear you whine about the smell through out lunch.”

Brian snickered at her and walked toward the front doors. “You know that there’s no way I’m going out to lunch in this dusty suit. We’ve got to stop by the loft so that I can change.”

“And I’m the pussy?” Cynthia asked rhetorically.
 

****
 

London

“Can you excuse me a moment?” Daphne asked Mitchell.

“Are you not feeling well?” the doctor asked worriedly.

“No,” Daphne said smiling. “I’m fine. I just…I know it’s only been an hour, but I want to make sure that Justice is okay.”

“Feel free to make your call here, Daphne,” Mitchell replied from across the café table. “I don’t mind.”

Daphne took her cell phone out of her purse and quickly dialed her grandmother’s phone. When her grandmother picked up she could hear Justice crying in the background. “Grandma, is Justice okay?” she asked worriedly.

“She’s fine, dear, just a little spoiled from all the attention you give her,” Lisa said.

Daphne seethed with anger and tried to keep it under control as she spoke, “You can’t spoil a baby that young, Grandma.”

“I’ve raised four children, Daphne. I know how to raise children.”

Daphne was almost positive that her grandmother’s child rearing was a large cause as to why her own mother was so cold to her. “But Justice is my child,” Daphne replied, “and I know her cry. Even over the phone I know she’s crying because she needs to eat.”

“Then she should’ve taken the formula I tried to give her,” the woman replied testily.

Daphne stood up from her chair and gathered her purse. “Well I’m on my way home, so I’ll tend to her when I get there,” Daphne said heatedly.

“You have already made a bad impression on Mitchell?” Lisa asked. “Daphne, he may be your only chance at…”

“Grandma, grandma, I can’t hear you, you’re cutting out,” Daphne faked and closed her phone.

Mitchell had already placed money on the table and was helping Daphne put her jacket on. “What’s wrong with Justice?” he asked as they walked toward the exit of the café.

Daphne walked quickly out of the door and hailed a cab. “My grandmother thinks that I shouldn’t breast feed and even though I left her milk in the freezer, she’s refused to give it to her. This is the second time it happened, Mitchell,” she explained. “Justice wouldn’t eat the formula and now my grandmother is just letting her cry. She says I spoil her.”

“Come on,” Mitchell said, taking Daphne’s hand. “If we run down the block this way we’ll have a quicker chance at getting a cab,” he told her, looking at the crowded street.

Daphne went along with Mitchell and they were soon in a taxi. “I’m really sorry about this,” she said. “This was only our second date alone and I’m cutting out early. I totally understand if you don’t want to ask me out again.”

Mitchell placed his arm around Daphne’s and brushed her hair away from her face. “Daphne, I know we’ve only known one another a short time, but I’m falling in love with you and the last thing I want to do is stop asking you out.”

Daphne gasped and looked with wide eyes at the man beside her. Her heart fluttered in her chest as she looked into his eyes and saw the unmistakable love in them. “Mitch…” she was at a loss for words.

“It’s okay,” Mitchell laughed. “I didn’t mean to throw that at you. I know you have a lot going on in your life and the last thing you need to deal with is my feelings for you if you don’t return them. I don’t want to put you in an awkward position.”

“I thought I wasn’t ready for a serious relationship,” Daphne spoke softly. “But I think that I feel the same way, Mitchell. But I have Justice to think about and…”

“I want to marry you, Daphne,” Mitchell confessed. “I think about you and Justice and the life we could have together all the time.”

“What?” Daphne nearly yelled as the cab came to a stop outside of her house.

“I want you to be my wife,” Mitchell clarified, handing the cab driver money. He opened the door and ushered Daphne out.

“Mitch, I… I’m not ignoring you, but I need to get to Justice,” Daphne said as she ran up the steps to her house.

“I know,” Mitchell said, running up after her. “You’re a great mother, Daphne. Don’t listen to what your grandmother says; you’re doing great. And we can talk about my proposal whenever you’re ready.”

Daphne unlocked the door to the house but before she went in she grabbed Mitchell by the shirt and planted a deep kiss on his lips. “Thank you,” she whispered before running inside to comfort her daughter.

Mitchell stood on the stoop for a moment in a daze and then followed the woman he loved inside the home.
 

****
 

Pittsburgh

“P…p… pall.”

“No, Justin. B…Buh….Ball. Ball,” Jennifer sounded out the word.

The right side of Justin’s jaw twitched as he tried to speak the sound his mother was directing. “P…puh….”

“I think we can stop with the speech therapy today,” Kari interrupted. “You look very tired, Justin. Are you tired?” The last thing Justin’s new speech therapist wanted was for Justin to have a seizure triggered by exhaustion. Jennifer Taylor was a wonderful mother, but she often pushed her son a little too hard.

“Y…yes,” Justin said, shaking his head up and down.

“Okay then,” Kari said, taking the book from Justin’s lap. “We’ll finish reading this book after you have a nap.”

Justin watched his mother’s face make an expression he recognized as angry. It made him feel very sad and because he was unable to control his own emotions, he began to cry.

“Justin, what’s wrong?” Kari asked.

“M…m…mommy an…a...ngre,” Justin wept.

“I’m not angry,” Jennifer said quickly, taking her son’s left hand in her own. “Calm down, Justin. I’m not angry. I’m not.” She smiled at Justin and said, “See, I’m happy.”

Justin didn’t understand how his mother could make the happy face and he still felt like she didn’t mean it. “No…”

“Justin,” Kari tried, “your mom isn’t angry. She’s just worried about you. Now take some deep breaths and calm down, okay?”

Justin tried his hardest to stop crying and managed to right as exhaustion took over him and he fell asleep.

Jennifer immediately turned on the therapist and growled, “He hates it here.”

“Jennifer, I saw your expression when I said we were finished with the therapy. You weren’t happy and Justin understood that and it scared him,” Kari told the woman. “You need to be careful about showing him how you feel. With the exception of what he’s learning from me and the other therapists, you are his world. Justin takes his keys from you.”

“I want to take him home,” Jennifer responded. “He’s barely made any progress since he’s been here and I’d rather hire personal therapists to take care of him.”

Kari knew how over-protective Jennifer was of her child and being a mother herself, she knew she’d be the same way. However, she knew that her patient’s father did not want Jennifer to be in charge of his son’s care but he had no choice in the matter. “Justin has made a lot of progress, Mrs. Taylor,” Kari protested. “But as everyone has explained to you, he is not going to get better over night. He needs to…”

“Stop!” Jennifer yelled standing up from her chair. “I am tired of all of you telling me that Justin is weak…”

“I’m not saying that,” Kari interrupted, “and I’m sure no one else on the staff here has said that.”

“But that’s what you’re implying,” Jennifer retorted. “So, I want him prepared to leave on Saturday. I’ve already been in touch with at home nurses and therapists and…”

“Okay,” Kari relented, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’ll have Justin’s coordinator come and speak with you.”

Jennifer put her hands on her hips and glared at the young woman until she left the room. She then walked over to her purse and took her cell phone out and dialed Craig’s number.

“Mommy?” Molly answered her father’s phone.

“Molly,” Jennifer asked, “where’s your father?”

“He’s right here but I wanted to say hi.”

Jennifer’s anger lessoned a little and she spoke softly, “Hi, Molly.”

“Are you going to come over and see how I decorated my room?” the little girl asked hopefully.

“I said I would tonight,” Jennifer replied. “I’ll be there in a couple of hours.”

“Good!” Molly cheered.

“Can I talk to your Dad now?” Jennifer asked her daughter.

“Okay, I love you, Mom.”

“Love you too,” Jennifer said.

“Jennifer what do you need?” Craig asked, wanting to cut to the chase.

“Justin is coming home Saturday,” Jennifer said firmly. “I’m almost done arranging it.”

Molly had come home the first week of August and by that time; Craig had already gotten an apartment for the both of them. The way Jennifer had acted since Justin was moved to the private care facility gave Craig no other choice than to leave his wife. He had to set up a home for his daughter and begin to build their life.

Jennifer had beat Craig to the court order. Daphne’s mother was a lawyer and she quickly retrieved a judge’s order granting Jennifer power of attorney as long as she agreed to put Justin in a care facility for a month and provided proper care thereafter.

Craig had been devastated and even though he tried to reason with his wife, she seemed like a completely different woman to him. He was hurt even more when he asked for a separation and Jennifer gave in easily to also allow him to have Molly move in with him.

“You know that I have no say-so over his care, you’ve made sure of that. So why are you telling me?” Craig barked.

“I’m going to have a bed delivered and I wanted to make sure your office is cleared out. They’ll need to set it up in there.”

“Everything of mine is out of the house,” Craig replied. “I told you this last week.”

“Okay, well I have a lot to do. I’ll be at your place to see Molly soon, okay?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Just don’t be late; she’s been waiting on your visit all day.”

“I won’t be late, Craig,” Jennifer replied testily and hung up the phone. She looked over at her sleeping son and spoke to him quietly, “I’m doing this for your own good, Justin. These people don’t know how strong you are, I do.”
 

****
 

Saturday, September 2, 2000

“Eat mukee!” Gus shouted the moment he blew out his candle.

“You’ll get a monkey to eat, Gus,” Brian told his son. He moved the cake to other side of the table so that the birthday boy couldn’t reach it from his high chair.

“You get the first piece,” Debbie told Gus, “because you’re the birthday boy.”

Cynthia arranged a stack of paper plates beside the cake and suddenly felt something hit her face.

“Good shot!” Michael laughed.

Brian looked at what had been thrown and then looked at his son. “You say sorry, Gus.”

Gus looked over at his uncles who were all snickering in laughter and started to laugh with them.

Cynthia rolled her eyes at the three stooges and gently placed her hand on Brian’s arm when she could see he was tensing up. “Don’t worry about it for now, Brian. That’s probably the tenth time that Gus has taken off this bib.” So that Debbie wouldn’t hear she whispered in his ear, “I think he hates the twinkling light and the song that goes off every time he moves.”

“Then hurry up and throw it in the hamper. I could care less if he ruins his shirt. That bib has been driving me crazy,” Brian muttered.

Cynthia looked over at Debbie who was walking toward ‘the boys’ and ran off toward the bathroom to hide the bib while she wasn’t looking.

Brian snickered to himself, thoroughly enjoying the fact that he had his accomplice do the dirty work for him. She never minded and it was one of the many reason they got along so well.

Debbie had walked over to Michael, Emmett and Ted and slapped each one of them upside the head. “I could’ve sworn that there was only one child here.”

Emmett was the first to apologize, “Sorry, Debbie.”

Michael followed quickly, “Sorry, Ma.”

Ted shrugged his shoulders and blushed, “I’m going to go help Brian.”

Debbie smiled smugly and put her hands on her hips and her eyes settled back on Brian who was watching Gus devour his piece of cake. His laughter and ease with the mess Gus was making brought tears to her eyes.

****

London

Mitchell stuck the tabs in the correct spots on Justice’s diaper and buttoned her pink sleeper. “There you go, Justice. You’re all ready for bed.”

Daphne walked into Justice’s new bedroom, wrapped her arm around Mitchell’s waist and kissed her cheek. “Thanks for giving her, her bath and getting her ready for bed.”

“It was a pleasure,” the man replied, smiling down at the child. “She’s such a good baby about these kinds of things. I remember my little cousin Amy would cry every time she was bathed or changed.”

Daphne picked up Justice and placed her against her chest and patted her back soothingly. “I have no idea how your mother could’ve dealt with that. You said she babysat for all your cousins while you were growing up?”

“Yup,” Mitchell confirmed, “there was twelve of us there after school for a few years. During the day she usually only had two or three kids on her hands, but after school it was controlled chaos.”

“I can’t imagine how your mom and dad dealt with that. Raising one baby is so much work.”

“Well, she had my Dad,” Mitchell reminded her, “he worked from home usually. And my mom loves children so it didn’t bother her. And now, you have me.”

Daphne nodded and kissed Mitchell’s cheek as she passed him on the way to the rocking chair. “I can’t believe it sometimes.”

Mitchell sat on the ottoman in front of Daphne and began to massage her feet as she rocked Justice. “Well, it’s real. You’ll always have me, if you want me.”

“I do.” Daphne smiled appreciatively at her fiancé’. “Thanks for letting us move in here, even though it was so sudden.”

“I’m sorry for how it happened, but I’m glad that you’re both here. I just wish that your Grandmother wouldn’t have been so mean to you.”

“I really don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t been there, Mitchell. If I couldn’t have come here I wouldn’t have anywhere to go. My family seems to think that Justice is a big mistake and what my Grandmother said…” Daphne paused and took a deep breath before continuing, “It was the worst thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“Well it isn’t true,” Mitchell said softly. “I can’t say that I’m glad the circumstances that led you to me took place, but I am happy that we met and I do believe in fate. I want you to know that you can talk to me about Justin any time, Daphne. It’s not going to make me mad, jealous or spiteful and it certainly isn’t going to change how I feel about you.”

“You promise?” Daphne asked wishfully.

“I promise,” the man replied. “Justin is your best friend, right? He’s been there with you, through everything he could be in your life?”

Daphne was happy that Mitchell didn’t talk about Justin as though he was dead as her parents and grandmother had, the realization brought tears to her eyes. “Yes, Justin was always there for me.”

“Then he had to have helped make you the woman I love and he helped make your little girl, who I love too. I know that when we meet, I’ll get to ask him a billion embarrassing questions about you and I can’t wait for that,” he gave Daphne a wiry smile as he got down on his knees and shuffled toward the chair and placed his hand over hers. “He’s a part of your life and he always will be. And I promise you, the moment we hear that he’s woken up, I’ll buy us plane tickets for Pittsburgh.”

Daphne frowned a little and whispered the question that she feared the answer to even though she’d already received one for it. “You’ll understand that I’ll want to go back there to live, so that Justin can be with his daughter?”

“We talked about this before you agreed to marry me yesterday, Daphne,” Mitchell replied. “Even if my job won’t transfer me right away, I’ll make sure that you and Justice are able to live in Pittsburgh comfortably, until I can make it over there. I don’t care what your grandmother said about him. You are sure that Justin will make a great father and I trust your judgment implicitly. I would never stand in the way of him knowing Justice. He’s already missed so much of her life; I wouldn’t want him to miss another second.”

Daphne saw the passionate truth in Mitchell’s eyes and for the first time since she found out she was pregnant, she felt safe and sure of her life and decisions. “I love you, Mitchell,” she confessed and pulled his head toward hers for a kiss.
 

****

Pittsburgh

“When you’re a little steadier on your feet, I’ll show you your bedroom,” Jennifer talked hopefully as she fluffed the pillows behind Justin’s head. “But for now, the office will have to work.”

Justin understood very little of what his mother was saying to him. It all sounded familiar and he knew that he should recognize more of the words she used and put them together so that they had meaning. He closed his eyes and tried to recall the book Kari had read him that had some of the same words in it. “Dad w…works at th…the officcc.”

Jennifer gasped in surprise. “Right, Justin. Your dad works in an office.”

Justin looked away from his mom and thought about how much he wanted Kari to read him that book again. He didn’t like when she made him read the book, but he knew that because it was Saturday, he didn’t have to do words. When Kari saw him today she would read to him and Lynn would rub the arm that always hurt when she did.

“You did so good speaking a whole sentence, Justin,” Jennifer praised. She put her hands on her hips and snickered, “They said your progress might be halted until you adjusted to being home. They don’t know you like I do.”

Justin turned his gaze to his mother and watched her talking at him. He wished that Kari would read to him and his arm was hurting again and he needed Lynn to make the hurt go away. His Mommy always gave him what he asked for so Justin tried really hard to move his hurt arm and tell his mother what he need. “L…l…lyn C…carm,” Justin said and immediately knew that he wasn’t saying the words correctly.

Jennifer grabbed the picture book from the bag of things she took home from the rehabilitation facility and placed it in Justin’s lap. “Do you want to look at this?”

Justin shook his head and shoved his arm toward his mother’s chest. “Oww,” he whimpered.

Jennifer’s smile was immediately wiped from her face when she saw her son’s anguish. She sat beside him on his bed and began to massage his arm and hand. “I’m sorry it hurts, Justin.” With Jennifer’s other hand she reached over and wiped away the tears that rolled down Justin’s cheeks.

Justin slowly started to feel the shaking pain recede; more so once his mother began to use both of her hands to touch the hurting spot in the middle of his hand. She did it better than Lynn, but he still wanted Kari to read to him. But then his mother started to sing to him and he realized that he liked that much better. “Sleep,” Justin whispered just before yawning.

Jennifer stopped singing her son’s favorite lullaby when she noticed that Justin didn’t stutter on the word, it was a huge achievement. She kissed his cheek spoke softly to him, “You go to sleep, Justin. It’s been a big day. Tomorrow is going to be even bigger. Nurse Jessica is going to be here early tomorrow morning. She’s going to live here with us and help you get better.”

“Song?” Justin requested, wanting Jennifer to continue her singing. He closed his eyes and sighed deeply when his mother began the song again.

Jennifer continued to rub Justin’s hand as she sang the same song she’d recited many times to him as a child, one that she hadn’t expected to sing to him when he was eighteen. The thought made her eyes water and her voice became horse as she sung the last lines of the song, “Please don’t take my Sunshine away.”

Jennifer slowly extracted herself from Justin’s side when she noticed Justin had fallen asleep. She placed the chart on the desk and marked the time that Justin had fallen asleep and the time and length of time she’d massaged his hand and arm.

A year ago, this definitely was not what Jennifer expected to be doing with her child. She’d imagined that she would probably have been at home with Craig and Molly, having a relaxing dinner after calling Justin and making sure that he was settling into his dorm room okay.

Chris Hobbes had taken away so much from her family. She still held onto every one of the dreams she dreamt when Justin was a child, but now, Justin didn’t even have his own dreams. His days were filled with scheduled therapies, outbursts of anger and tears. His goals weren’t to pass classes or get a date; they were about talking, walking and chewing his food carefully so that he wouldn’t choke.

When the trial date finally came, the prosecutors made a deal with Chris’ lawyers and he received practically no penalty for what he had done. He was given 1,000 hours of community service and ordered to pay for any of Justin’s medical care that he needed as a result of the attack. Craig had wanted to sue after the trial, but Jennifer couldn’t imagine going through another trial. It was hard enough getting together all of the medical ‘evidence’ of Justin’s injuries the first time. She just wanted to forget about it and help her son move on.

Justin didn’t understand anything that had happened to him. The psychologists all estimated that he would probably never remember the incident even if his subconscious did with nightmares and fear of men. Justin never once asked what happened to him or wondered why he was the way he was. He didn’t realize that he was different, or so she knew. She was very careful about what she told Justin about who he was before he was hurt and with all the information Justin had to take in, he was overwhelmed whenever Jennifer did talk about it, so she kept those conversations to a minimum.

After writing down Justin’s information on the chart, Jennifer walked back over to her son and sat beside him. She took his hand in her own and spoke in a quiet tone, “I’m sorry if I’ve done the wrong thing for you, Justin. But I am doing what I think is best for you. I hope that when we get you back to being the you that you should be, you’ll understand that.”

 

****
 

“You’re okay, Dada’s here,” Brian said, picking up Gus from his crib. He held the baby on his hip and walked toward the refrigerator where he kept a ready-made bottle of milk.

“Milk,” Gus cooed tiredly, rubbing his face back and forth against his father’s bare chest. He giggled softly when a few of the hairs tickled his nose.

Brian glanced at the clock on the refrigerator display and saw there was only fifteen minutes left of Gus’ birthday.

“Brr…brrr…. Cold!” Gus spoke, popping his head up as the air from the fridge hit his back.

Brian grabbed the bottle quickly and laughed at his son’s antics. Gus was now alert, staring up at him and faking chattering his teeth. “You’re so smart; do you know that, Gus?”

Brian wasn’t expecting a reply but Gus gave him one, “I know.”

Brian eyed his child curiously as he put the bottle in the warmer. “So is it going to mean the next seventeen years are going to be harder or easier?”

Gus smiled at his Daddy and said, “Hotter.”

Brian squeezed Gus to him as tightly as he could without breaking him and kissed all over his chubby cheeks, igniting a roar of laughter from his son. “You’re my little Einstein, Gus!” he told him.

Gus continued to giggle and bat his hands on Brian’s chest as he said a few jumbled words to patty-cake.

“You had enough cake,” Brian said, capturing Gus’ little wrists in his hands as he placed the boy’s bottom on the counter top. “How about I teach you a new game?”

Gus looked at Brian with wide green eyes and nodded his head.

Brian took one of Gus’ hands, balled his fist up and stuck up his pointer finger. “Now when I say; ‘Gus, how old are you?’, you’re going to hold up your hand and say, “One”, because that’s how old you are now. Do you think you can you do that?”

Gus nodded in what looked like understanding, but he often nodded his head whenever anyone would talk to him about anything.

“Okay,” Brian said in a deep voice. “Gus, how old are you?”

“I one!” Gus shouted, shoving his little fist and pointer in the air. “I one!”

Brian thought for a moment and tried to recall whether or not he’d told Gus to answer with, ‘I’m one’ or just ‘one’. It was late and his mind was overly-tired from the big day, but he was almost positive that he’d only said, ‘one’. “May have trouble with speech and comprehension, huh?” Brian said aloud as he laughed and took the bottle out of the warmer.

Gus made a grab for the bottle. “Bottle, Daddy.”

Brian laughed louder as he heard his son perfectly say the word bottle. “Not yet, Sonny-boy. I’ve got to test it and make sure it’s not too hot.” He squirted the liquid onto his wrist and deemed it the perfect temperature. “Okay, you can have it,” he relented, passing it into Gus’ eager hands.

Gus began to greedily suck on the bottle as Brian picked him back up and carried him over to his crib. When he saw where he was going he promptly popped the nipple out of his mouth and protested, “No. Dada’s bed.”

Brian tried to be firm with Gus because he would likely be an only child and have whatever material things he ever wanted. So where other aspects of parenting were concerned, Brian usually stuck to his guns. But tonight, he couldn’t help but give in to Gus. A year ago, he couldn’t even hold his son in his arms.

A year ago, he became a father and thought that at any moment he would lose that title. For months he thought he was going to lose his little boy. Even now, being separated from him for any length of time made Brian feel as though he’d go crazy. He didn’t want to miss any part of Gus’ life. The last year seemed to pass so quickly he knew that it time would go even faster now that he had so much going on in his life.

“You can sleep in my bed, just for tonight,” Brian whispered to his son, walking him into his bedroom.

Gus smiled coyly at Brian and clumsily jumped up and down when Brian placed him on the bed.

Brian knelt on the bed beside Gus and grabbed his hands to stop him from jumping. “It’s late, Sonny-boy. You need to go to sleep.” He pulled Gus down onto his chest as he lay back onto his pillow.

Gus straddled Brian’s chest and bounced a few times. “Wake, Dada! Wake, Dada!”

“Sleep, Gus!” Brian replied, pulling Gus down so he rested his head on his shoulder. “Take your bottle or I’m going to put it back in the fridge,” Brian warned gently.

Hunger won out over playing so Gus took the bottle from Brian’s hands and put it in his mouth.

Brian turned onto his side and watched Gus drink. When Gus’ eyelids closed, his hands began to lose their grip on the bottle and Brian took over for his son. With only a few sips left, Gus fell completely asleep. Brian placed the bottle on his nightstand and moved Gus so he lay on his chest once again. “We did it,” Brian whispered, stroking Gus’ back. “You’re here with me, Gus. You’re healthy and strong and so smart. You defied all those stupid statistics and I know you’ll continue to. I think your Mommies would be proud of you,” his voice hitched as he added, “and me.” He placed a kiss on Gus’ forehead and told him, “You saved my life the day you were born. I love you so much, Sonny-boy. Happy Birthday.”

Gus’ breath was deep and even and his baby warmth gave Brian comfort and soon lulled him to sleep.
 

THE END (Continued in sequel: Ardor)

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