The List

Part 13

Dinner at Deb's

Brian did not want to show up early at Debbie’s again, so he drove to work instead. After all, he usually put in a few hours on Sundays. He smiled at the thought of what had kept him from his workaholic habits. God. He had loved fucking Justin, just loved it.

He parked in his reserved spot, used his key to unlock the elevator, and his code to get into the office. No one else was there. He sat at his desk, booting up the computer and opening the Leo Brown file. They were due to start working on the spring campaign with the new line of underwear coming out. He wanted something different from the usual showcasing of the collection on Drew Boyd’s physique. That was getting old. They needed a fresh approach.

He imagined the new underwear on a beautiful round ass of his acquaintance… Gorgeous ass. Great tasting ass. So fucking tight, so perfect. Perfect when Justin was riding him, biting his luscious lower lip, his eyes glazed with pleasure. Perfect with one hand stroking that gorgeous cock, the large head popping in and out of his fist, his other hand playing with his nipples. And that rapturous expression when he reached climax, followed by an almost triumphant smile when Brian came too and came hard, his whole body spasming with his release. God.

Sex with Justin was such a joyful experience. It added a whole new dimension to an act which Brian had performed so often, making it a novel experience for him. Justin was a completely unapologetic and uninhibited lover, completely carefree. He sought his own pleasure unashamedly and gave pleasure without self-consciousness, celebrating their bodies without preconception.

Brian was looking forward to being naked with his blond again, knowing he would again be surprised and delighted in unexpected ways, old moves made new by Justin’s thrill in their discovery, by his happiness in sharing such wonders with Brian. Sex with Justin was hot and sweet and fun and tender and oh, so fucking good…

Justin smelled so wonderful, his hair like fresh air and cut grass, his skin like… orange peel, maybe? Something citrusy yet sweet. Mix it with a bit of cumin and you had the scent of his crotch; amazingly arousing. Brian could spend an hour with his nose buried in the tight blond curls. Hell, he could spend an entire night there and love it, his head on the soft pillow of Justin’s thigh… That sixty-nine had been brilliant. Fun, because of Justin’s delight in its discovery, hot because of his natural abilities and innate gift for cock sucking, and… something else Brian could not quite put his finger on, something that had to do with sharing that experience, that giving and taking with Justin.

Brian loved the feel of Justin's skin, the texture of it, and its amazing glowing paleness. It had looked so good against the dark sheets. He could see in his mind’s eye Justin’s narrow hand, his long fingers closing on a fistful of sheets as he moaned in pleasure. God, he had loved pleasuring Justin, watching his face glow with it, watching the disbelief in the blue eyes at his body’s capacity for pleasure.

Brian realized he had been sitting in his office for an hour, and had gotten nothing done, his mind completely absorbed in reliving his lovemaking with Sunshine. Lovemaking? Sunshine said he was in love with him. Brian had obviously just responded to his feelings. Though he’d never felt this close to someone while having sex, so… Oops, no time to explore that thought! He had to go to Deb’s now, or he’d really be late.

He got up, turned off his computer, and was back in the Corvette five minutes later. Getting to Debbie’s did not take long; still he was the last to arrive. They had already started on the antipasto.

“Daddy!” Gus was in his arms almost before he had a chance to take off his jacket.

“Hey, Sonnyboy. Missed me since yesterday?”

Lindz, accurately predicting her son would end up on his father’s lap, had saved him the seat next to her.

When he sat down with his Sonnyboy on his knee, he looked up, unerringly meeting smiling blue eyes filled with warmth and want from across the table. He could tell his own glance was soft and yearning and he didn’t give a fuck. Seeing Justin again just crystallized for him that indeed, in the past couple of weeks, this boy had turned his life upside down. He wasn’t sure what it was he was feeling that made him want to walk across the room and gently touch Sunshine’s cheek before slowly joining their mouths (neither of which he did), but he knew that it was different from anything he’d ever felt before.

It was so damn terrifying, but Justin… God, Justin was sweet, and kind, and caring. Of all the people in the world to take a chance with, he was probably the safest. Brian smiled at him, and Justin smiled back, and he just wanted to take him home to the loft and make love to him again. He then became aware that their exchange had not been as discreet as all that. Ben looked away, not wanting to intrude, though there was a small smile on his face, and Blake, less inhibited, just gave him a huge shit-eating grin. Brian looked down at his plate.

“Lindz!” he complained, as she was adding raviolis to the already overflowing smorgasbord of Italian delicacies in front of him.

“Oh! Shit. Sorry, Brian, I’m so used to serving Gus…” She laughed. “At least, we’re not having steak… I probably would have cut it for you… “

Brian rolled his eyes at her and told his son, “Sonnyboy, I hope you’re hungry!”

“I had aspgettis already, Daddy, but I like the pillows with the cheese inside.”

Brian blew on a ravioli, making sure the cheese filling was cool enough, and fed it to the boy.

“Have some, Daddy. It’s yummy.”

“Maybe later. How about a bite of this?” he asked, offering the boy a bite of eggplant parmesan.

“No, thank you, Daddy. It makes my tongue tingle and my lips too.”

It did the same to Brian, a mild form of allergy to the eggplant, he thought, and for some reason, the fact that his son should share the same sensitivity felt right, just like the shape of their ears being similar felt right, or the fact that their fingers looked like different sizes of the same model.

In the brouhaha of the family gathering, Sunshine’s soft voice still reached his ears, clear as a bell, though by rights, it should have been drowned out by Ben’s tenor and Debbie’s continuous fog horn. Justin was talking to Blake, whose answers were swallowed by the general noise, about how grateful he was for his now free afternoons, and how he was planning to occupy his time in the studio at PIFA. He was also asking Blake if he would like to see a portrait of Ted. He had done one, because he thought Ted had such great expressions and felt it turned out well. Would Blake like to check it out after dinner?

Brian realized Mikey had been talking to him for a while and that he had no idea about what … He concentrated on his friend, trying to infer from his present words the gist of what had been said, “… just can’t stand to see her cry, and Lindsay isn’t any better. So I was hoping you or Ben could come and be the bad guys. She’ll be getting three of them…”

Oh, right, JR’s vaccinations. “Either one of us will be happy to be the bad guy, you wimps,” he stated. “Just bring one of those chocolate eggs with the toy inside that she likes.”

“But isn’t that like a bribe?” asked Michael, concerned. “Melanie feels strongly about not giving her bribes to get her to comply.”

“No. It’s a consolation prize. These injections do hurt, Mikey. When is the appointment?”

So Brian got roped in, along with Ben, to giving up half his Wednesday afternoon to take his almost daughter to the pediatrician with Mikey. Cynthia would be thrilled with him. Ben joked he’d be there with a chocolate egg for Michael, who was bound to be even more traumatized than his little daughter. The Daddies would then go to the Munchers for their weekly dinner, where no doubt JR would be fussed over all over again by her Mommies. Brian would pass on that part. That he’d much rather go to Woody’s…and get his cock sucked was not said aloud in current company, but it was understood by all. Blue eyes met his then looked away quickly. Shit.

At first, Brian was upset that Justin had looked unhappy, but then he was immediately pissed at Justin for making him feel upset. Justin worked Wednesday nights. What did he imagine Brian was going to do? Stay home and embroider? What did he have to be unhappy about? Would Brian prefer giving Sunshine another pool lesson, and have him suck his cock? Yes. Was he ready to give up all the pleasures of the flesh because he felt that way? Hell no! After all, variety was the spice of life. Justin knew this, had known this long before last night. He needed to get with the fucking program. Brian refused to be made to feel guilty about it.

He deliberately chose to concentrate on Mikey, Lindz and Gus for the rest of the meal. It was not easy. His eyes, his attention naturally seemed to stray to Justin. He was relieved when after the meal, Ben, Justin and Ted reprised their roles of cleaner uppers in the kitchen and he was given a chance to relax and lie around on the floor with his son, playing with a wooden train set as old as Michael.

But when Gus tired out and crawled on his mother’s lap, he could no more help going to Justin than could a moth to a flame. In the kitchen, Justin had gotten a sketchbook out of his messenger bag and was showing Blake, who had also found his way there, the pencil drawing he had made of Ted. Both Ted and Brian ended up looking at it over their shoulders.

“Hey! I look good!” said Ted, sounding surprised.

“I tell you that every day,” said Blake smiling at him. “I love how you captured the humor in his eyes,” he added to Justin. “It’s fantastic, Sunshine. Can I buy it from you?”

“No, no, of course not. Take it. It’s yours!”

“Justin,” said Ted, “you cannot just give away your work. I’m sure you spent a few hours on this, and I know you need the money.”

“But… But you didn’t ask for this or anything… I was just fooling around to see if I could do a good job on portraits…”

“Why?” asked Blake, curious.

“Well, someone gave me the idea of doing a couple of highly recognizable portraits and hanging them in the diner, with a note saying I was available to do pencil sketches for cash. This was just a dry run…”

“How much are you planning on asking for them?” asked Ted.

“Uh… One hundred. But there is no way I’ll take that from you guys. As I said, this was just for me, to prove to myself it was a viable option. You have great bones, Ted, and really nice eyes. And I really like your lips….”

“Should I be worried, Justin?” Blake teased.

Sunshine realized how what he had been saying could be misconstrued and he blushed a deep red. “Oh, my god, Blake, no! I was speaking as an artist!” Then he backpedaled, not wanting to hurt Ted’s feelings. “Not that I don’t find you attractive Ted…”

They were all laughing at him now, and finally he joined them, realizing he couldn’t win.

“How about we pay you fifty for this one and full price for one of Blake to go with it?” asked Ted kindly.

“Really?” Sunshine’s smile was brilliant. “That’d be great!”

“Do you have the portraits you are going to hang in the diner?” asked Ben, who had finished putting away the dishes.

“I do. I still have to get the subjects’ permission, of course,” said Sunshine, turning several pages in his sketchbook. Brian was not particularly happy to see that they were all drawings of that damn fiddler, including a study of his hand, and a close up that Ian might even have posed for…

 

“I was thinking of this one…” It was a drawing of Debbie, in all her waitressing glory, her “Got Lube?” T-shirt plainly visible, definitely a Liberty Avenue icon,

“and may be this one?” The question was tentatively directed at Brian. It was a drawing of him, and he looked beautiful, but he thought his expression was off.

“The mother and the Stud of Liberty Avenue. How appropriate,” said Ted.

“It’s nice, Sunshine, but I don’t think I ever look at people with quite this expression on my face…”

Justin frowned. “You look at me that way.” Brian was taken aback as Ben tried to hide a smile and Blake openly smirked. In the drawing, his eyes were soft and full of feelings. Did he really look at Justin this way?

He smiled at Justin to remove the sting of his words. “Well, I’d rather you keep that drawing private, if you don’t mind.”

“Weeell then,” said Sunshine with a smirk, “how about this one?” Ted, Ben and Blake all cracked up. It was a gorgeous sketch of Brian getting his cock sucked.

“What the fuck, Justin?” asked Brian, not knowing how to react.

“I’m pretty sure most the patrons at the dinner have seen that expression on your face…” teased Justin.

“But, when did you…”

“At Babylon, last night. I’d never seen a backroom. Emmett gave me a tour… I drew it as soon as I got home, while the image while still fresh in my mind.”

“Jesus, Sunshine…”

“So, not The Blowjob either? Oh, all right then.” Justin rolled his eyes. “How about this one?” he offered.

“Boooring” said Ted.

“That one?”

“Nice,” said Ben.

“Yes. I like this one a lot,” admitted Justin.

“I can’t help but notice you have quite a collection of Brian sketches there, Justin…” teased Ted.

“Brian is beautiful,” he answered honestly. Then he blushed, realizing what he just said, and quickly added, “I, uh… I wanted to have a few choices for him to decide which one I could hang at the diner.”

There were a few smiles, but no one commented.

“So,” said Ted, lining them up on the table. “Which one for the diner? The boring one, the profile, or The Blowjob?”

“The Blowjob!” said Ben, smiling.

Chuckling, Blake concurred. “Definitely The Blowjob!”

“Yes, I totally agree!” said Ted, grinning. “Brian, the majority has spoken. The Blowjob wins!”

Brian gave him his Fuck you look. He reached for the “boring” one, setting it on top of The Blowjob. “This one for the diner, Sunshine. And I’ll buy the profile from you. One hundred bucks, right?”

“Really? It’s my favorite too,” said Justin earnestly, but then he added, teasing again, “though The Blowjob does have its charms…”

Brian answered, tongue in cheek, “I’ve never paid for a blowjob in my life. I’m not about to start now…”

Justin was serious again. “I want to take pictures of both drawings to keep if you don’t mind. Just for myself,” he told Brian and Ted. “I’ll get them to you next time I see you, OK? By then, I might have Blake’s ready, too.”

“You don’t need a photo or anything?” asked Ben.

“Oh, no. Not when I’ve been around the person for a while. I would for a total stranger, obviously… but I’ve spent quite a bit of time with Blake.”

They were suddenly interrupted: “What the fuck are all of you doing in my kitchen?” yelled Debbie from the living room.

Brian would have answered, “Fucking!” but his boy was in attendance.

“We just finished, Deb!” answered Ben the peacemaker.

“Good! Then get your asses over here! The coffee is getting cold!”

Brian held Justin back. Justin looked at him with a questioning smile and Brian answered by kissing him, just a touch at first, brushing their lips together, but then, unable to resist the elastic lips, it transformed into a gentle but real kiss.

As he pulled away, Justin, looking at him, shook his head and said, very seriously. “What am I going to do, Brian? It’s only been a few hours, but I already want you so bad…” Brian could read the hunger in his eyes. Considering the fact he felt exactly the same way, this was not brain surgery.

“You are going to come back to the loft with me, and we are going to fuck to exhaustion, Sunshine, that’s what you are going to do…”

“I have classes in the morning…” Justin objected.

“We’ll stop at your place. You can pick up what you need.”

“Emmett is supposed to give me a ride home…”

“That’s fine. Go with him, then get ready, I’ll stay here another half hour and pick you up. I’ll drop you at school in the morning on my way to work.”

Justin’s smile was blinding, thrilled as he was to be fresh out of objections.

He giggled. “Oh, my god. Now, I can’t wait. One night, and I’ve become a complete sex addict…”

Brian just wanted to drag him to Mikey’s old room and fuck him within an inch of his life right then and there… But they left the kitchen, Brian walking right behind Justin and sing-songing in his ear, “I’m gonna fuck you, I’m gonna fuck you…” as Justin giggled. They cut it out when they came into view of the others, though Brian discreetly pinched Justin’s ass.

Justin went to sit with the girls, and soon was holding JR, burping her.

Brian went and sat with Mikey, putting his arm around his shoulders. Michael was giving advice to Emmett who had been commandeered by some wealthy socialite to organize a Superman birthday party for her nine-year-old son, with a $10,000.00 budget.

“Can you believe that? $10,000.00?” said Emmett. “I’m pretty sure she means for the theme to be more than Superman paper plates and napkins…”

After a while, Emmett actually went to get his notebook and pen and started taking notes, because Michael was a wellspring of information and ideas. Emmett grinned. “You know I am paying you fifty bucks an hour for this as a special consultant, don’t you?” he asked.

“Cool,” said Michael, grinning. “I can do what lawyers do and pontificate for hours! What else do you want to know?”

Brian reflected on how great it was that his best friend had actually managed to translate his passion into a way of making a living. Red Cape made only a modest profit, but Mikey’s Internet business was booming and producing a very decent income stream. Brian was genuinely proud of him. He did zone out after a while though, not all that interested in Superman. His eyes went to Sunshine with the baby in his arms.

Justin was so beautiful. And sweet. Gus loved him, and obviously JR did too. He was kind, too. Three hours a day at the hospice for months… And he was also so fucking talented. He must have a photographic memory; all his sketches were exquisitely detailed and accurate. And his paintings… so fucking gorgeous. And best of all, he loved to fuck, apparently as insatiable as Brian himself, a wonderful surprise.

What did Brian Fucking Kinney have to offer someone like that? He thought back to Ben’s little speech in the steam room. Ben was like Sunshine, he only saw the good in people. But still. Brian tried to shut off the voices from his past that told him he had nothing to offer to anyone, and tried to be impartial.

Like Sunshine, he was beautiful, though older. He certainly intended to work hard at staying that way, so on that they were equals. He wasn’t sweet though. His kids loved him, and he loved them infinitely more than he’d ever thought he would, but sweet he wasn’t. Generous perhaps? With his friends, anyway. Was he kind? No. Helpful, maybe. When it suited him. Never selflessly.

Talented? In his profession: fuck yeah. He was a fucking Rembrandt at advertising. And someday soon, he would go for it and open his own agency, and really shine. He realized how much he wanted it. It was not just for personal satisfaction anymore. He wanted Sunshine to know how successful he could be; for Justin to be at least a fraction as impressed with Brian as Brian was with him. He had always said he didn’t give a shit what people thought. It had never been completely true, though; he had cared very much about his reputation. But now, the opinion of a single person he’d met only two weeks ago actually mattered. That was fucking weird.

Finally, there was sex. Brian smiled to himself. As for that, he knew he could satisfy Justin. He could please him until he passed out, satisfy any of his fantasies, and he was even discovering how much he enjoyed holding him. Sexually, he had no doubt he could make the boy very happy.

Why in the world was he doing this strange comparison? What was he trying to convince himself of? That twelve years of age difference didn’t matter? That a jaded 33 year-old had as much to offer as an enthusiastic 21 year-old?

Justin deserved the world. Brian was infinitely lucky the boy had fallen in love with him. He would give it his best. He would have some sunshine in his life for a while. Perhaps some day the young man would move on to bigger and better things. But until then, Brian was going to seize the moment, and enjoy it as much as possible, ignoring the nagging voice in his mind that sounded like his mother, whispering to him that he did not deserve this, that he would fuck it up and lose it all, and he would be left bleeding on the curb, as he deserved. Fuck it. Fuck her.

He looked at Justin, who happened to look up at the same moment and smile at him. Brian smiled back, allowing how much he really wanted Justin, wanted all of him to shine through. Justin’s eyes widened, and Brian got the full force of the Sunshine smile; Justin absolutely glowing with unfettered joy.

Two weeks ago, Brian’s life had been good, he’d been in control, he’d had everything just the way he wanted it. Then this blond kid had appeared out of nowhere to turn his perfect world upside down. Brian closed his eyes, listening to the erratic drumming of his heart. He was in a weaker position than ever before, vulnerable, exposed, and full of desires. And he would not choose to change a thing. This “thing” with Justin might be wrought with pitfalls, but he would not trade the budding feeling in his heart for anything. For the first time in his 33 long years, Brian Fucking Kinney was experiencing a concept that up until now had been completely foreign to him. He was happy.

************

 

Debbie was tickled pink when Brian stayed with her for a while once everyone had gone. Fuck. She was so easy to please. Why didn’t he ever make the effort? He owed her so much. They drank the last of the coffee that, to Brian’s horror, she insisted on warming up in the microwave and talked, mostly about Vic, and a little about Horvath, whom she had not seen again after the crackdown on Liberty right before the election for the new mayor. Brian could tell she wished it was otherwise, and decided to do something about it. When he left, she gave him a hug, and he kissed her cheek, the smell of her face powder reminding him of many other hugs she had bestowed upon him through the years when he really needed them.

As soon as he sat in the ‘Vette, however, he thought of nothing but what the night had in store, and drove to the tattoo parlor with a smile on his face and a huge boner in his pants.

He chuckled because Justin was waiting with a backpack at his feet, standing in the alcove in front of the old hotel’s door, probably freezing his ass off. Eager twat. He bounded enthusiastically to the ‘Vette, and sat down, an irrepressible grin on his face. Brian was well aware of his own smile, and covered the distance from the tattoo parlor to the parking garage of the loft in record time.

They actually had their first fuck of the night standing face to face in the elevator, Sunshine’s legs tight around Brian’s waist, kissing the entire time, and it went on from there. They finally made it to the bed after a shower, for the fourth round. When the alarm went off in the morning, Sunshine was sleeping soundly lying completely on top of Brian, and Brian’s last condom was still on. He chuckled, kissed the blond head, rolled to dump him unceremoniously onto the bed, and went to the shower.

Five minutes in and the door opened on a blond kid with spectacular bed head, but a very nice smile. Ten more minutes in and Brian was coming deep down the kid’s throat, wondering what he had done to deserve such an amazing lover. Of course he reciprocated, and would have swallowed Justin whole if he could. As it was, he probably gave Justin the best blowjob he’d given in his long illustrious career, and Justin, who unlike him wasn’t shy about expressing his appreciation, came screaming his name, which was very satisfying indeed.

TBC…

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