Hat Trick

“I just don’t get it, Ma. Brian will spend time with everyone except me, it seems. He’ll even spend time with Ben, but not me, and I’m his best friend. I try to understand that he’s spending time with all those jocks as a way of staying in shape, and filling his free time now that he doesn’t spend as much time in the backrooms, but why does he have to do it with all those college kids?  Is it a way of staying in touch with his youth? And that’s another thing. Why does he drag Ben into it? What would he have in common with my partner? And Ben goes! Without me!” Michael’s bottom lip was out, in full pout, which wasn’t as cute on a thirty-eight year old man as it had been on an eight year old boy, his mother reflected. Or rather, some thirty-eight year old men couldn’t carry it off. Now Brian, on the other hand....

Debbie looked to her partner for help with this but Carl buried his head deeper in the newspaper. She was on her own, it seemed. But not quite.

A little voice piped up. “It’s your hat, Daddy.” 

“What?” Michael turned impatiently and looked down at his five year old daughter, JR, and right behind her was her brother, Gus. He flushed with embarrassment. He tried very hard to be a good dad and knew he shouldn’t complain about any of the other parents in front of the kids, much less two of them.  Besides, you never knew what they might repeat when. And he definitely didn’t want Gus to hear him complaining about Brian!

“Daddy’s talking to Grandma right now, sweetheart. Why don’t you two run into the living room and play dolls?”

“I’m not playing dolls now. I’m waiting for Mama to take me to my piano lesson,” she explained patiently. “Besides, I know how you can play with Uncle Brian more, Daddy. Don’t you want to know?”

Debbie looked at her precious little granddaughter, with her large brown eyes in her too thin face and her heart swelled with love, as always. JR didn’t have the beauty that Gus Peterson-Marcus, her  constant companion had, the type that turned heads whenever he came into a room and made total strangers stop to stare, but she was a lovely little child, with her serious sparrow face, and bright inquisitive mind. Debbie adored her, and wonder of wonders, shy little JR loved her loud, brassy grandmother too. Gus was standing in the doorway now, a patient, long-suffering look on his face as he waited for his sister; he looked so much like his father that Debbie just had to smile. She turned back to her son.

“Let the little darling speak, Michael. Who knows, maybe she has a good idea. She’s got more brains than the two of us put together, that’s for sure.” Debbie lifted JR onto her lap and cuddled her close.

“Sure, Ma, my hat...which doesn’t exist, by the way, since I don’t wear hats, is what keeps me from spending more time with Brian. I suppose Ben wears the right hat?” He spoke patronizingly, winking at Gus.  The boy grinned back at him. 

“Listen to JR, Uncle Mike...she’s got it all worked out,” was the surprising suggestion from Gus.

A little annoyed that Gus was not with him on this as he expected, but instead was encouraging JR’s silliness, Michael turned back to his daughter, and in a slow, sweet tone, asked, “So, sweetheart, exactly what type of hat should Daddy buy to solve his problems?”

JR ignored the patronizing tone and merely gave the question her serious consideration, tilting her head as she did so. “It isn’t a hat you have to buy, it’s a hat you need to take off! I think you need to wear a different hat...isn’t that what your Daddy said, Gus?”

“He talked about me?” Michael stiffened in outrage. 

“Michael! Let the child talk!” Debbie screeched at him.

Sullenly, Michael sat down next to his daughter and waited while his mother quietly – for her – asked, “Jenny dear, what exactly did Brian say and who was he talking to? Do you remember?”

“Of course I do,” JR answered, looking every bit like her mother at that moment. “I told Gus that Daddy was not happy about not getting to play with all the big boys."

“Oh great,” Michael muttered and Debbie kicked him to shut him up.

"So he and I went into Uncle Brian's work-out room...we’re allowed to if we knock and he says we can come in,” she explained. “Coz sometimes Uncle Brian is in a bad mood if his work-out is hard, but sometimes he and Uncle Justin don’t like to wear a lot of clothes is what Hunter says.”

Carl snorted into his paper at that and Debbie said she could do a little kicking over there if the peanut gallery did any more editorializing.

“Sounds to me like the editorializing is coming from your grandson,” Carl shot back as he leisurely turned the page, but he didn’t make any more noise.

“Go on, sweetheart,” Debbie urged her.

“Well, Gus asked his Pops...he calls him that when he wants to get him in a good mood,” JR explained and Debbie snorted that time, but in fond amusement. Michael rolled his eyes, and JR sensed criticism of her best friend because she rushed to explain, “He doesn’t do it fake, Daddy. It’s just that, a lot of the time, Uncle Brian is not like, well, not like a Daddy kind of person. He’s more like an Uncle Justin and Auntie Em. Uncle Brian and Gus don’t make a big deal out of it or do it in front of lots of people or anything, it’s a between the two of them thing. Gus does it when he needs him to listen especially, daddy to son. That’s when he uses it. Because that’s when he has the Daddy hat on.”

“What’s the Daddy hat,” Michael asked, his annoyance growing. He felt foolish for thinking that a five year old could have the answer to his problem. Even his very smart five year old. And he knew that Brian’s son, even precocious as he might be, didn’t know everything.

Debbie’s reaction was different, of course. She was looking, from the corner of her eye, to see how young Gus was taking this innocent revelation of his secret closeness with “the sperm donor.”  He had his hands in his pockets and was staring up at the ceiling as he leaned against the doorframe, but he was worrying his lower lip with his teeth, and his tongue was in his cheek – classic Kinney male pose for discomfort, but he’d be damned if he let you know it. Good for you, kiddo, she thought. She glared at her son, even as she repeated his question in a milder voice.

“A Daddy Hat, huh. Sounds like a good thing to keep around and makes perfect sense. So, Brian has a Daddy Hat that he wears when Gus needs him to be more Daddyish, or, as they call it, Pops, and when he doesn’t need to be Pops, he puts that role aside, is that it, sweetie?”

“Exactly!”  JR beamed at her grandmother, relieved that one of her Novotny relatives was quick on the up-take. “It’s what you call it when you’re acting especially Daddy-ish,” Michael’s very smart five year old explained patiently to her father, using a very kind, slow tone – to her grandmother’s delight. “Like when you read me a bedtime story, Daddy, you say, ‘Let me slip my Daddy hat on.’  Don’t you remember?”

And it struck Michael that, in fact, he did say just that on occasion. Seeing the dawning light of realization on her Daddy’s face, JR went on more confidently. “Sometimes Daddy Ben wears the Daddy Hat too.  Like when he went to my parent-teacher conference with me, because you had to go to a conference and Mama had work, and he said to Ms. Patterson, I have the Daddy Hat on today.”

“You explained that very well, JR,” Debbie praised her.  “But what does that have to do with spending time with the boys?” Debbie asked, but she thought she already knew.

“Well, Uncle Brian just kind of said that he thought that was something that Daddy Ben would have to answer, but he would make sure he did.  But then Uncle Justin said it was because Daddy Ben and Uncle Brian know how to wear different hats, and they can leave their daddy hats home when they play with the non-Daddies.”

JR looked earnestly at him.  “So, that’s the trick, Daddy. You just have to learn how to wear your guy hat when you go out with Uncle Brian and Daddy Ben, and your Daddy Hat when you do stuff with me. And then you can be more happy, okay, Daddy?”

Looking into his daughter’s hopeful face, Michael couldn’t do anything other than nod. Swallowing past his tight throat, he said, “That’s certainly the trick, pumpkin. Thanks for helping me out, and thank you, Gus. Now, how about a quick story, while you wait for your Mama, okay?”

Debbie watched her son as, with Gus standing near the window to watch for Melanie, he settled down with his daughter on his lap, the metaphorical Daddy hat firmly on his dark head.  She sighed. She wished Michael could let things be as easy as they could be. As they should be.

***********************************************************

“Why do we have to play basketball...I suck at basketball?” Justin whined.

“Because everyone else is good at basketball and enjoys it, Sonny boy...more or less... and the idea is to have fun and get some exercise, which wouldn’t hurt you, you realize. You won’t have that boyish figure forever if you don’t exercise.” Brian dribbled easily past him and shot what would have been a three point basket – if Ben hadn’t jumped up and blocked it.

“Whoo!  Yay for Gay!” Emmett cheered, shaking two pink pompoms. 

“Yay for gay? What the fuck?” Justin looked at him.  “Aw crap, I’m going to have to play this stupid game if sitting out means I have to be a cheerleader with Emmett!” He laughed and punched his friend in the side to soften the sting of his words.

“Come on, enough warm up, or in Justin’s case, enough whining,” Greg, one of the local jocks announced. “Do we have captains for teams?”

“Am I in time to play?”  Michael came running up. He had on shorts, old converse sneakers, a t-shirt and, indeed, a hat– a baseball cap worn backward. Hunter looked like he wanted to die of embarrassment.

Brian sucked in his bottom lip and looked across at Ben. They seemed to mentally flip a coin, and with a sigh, Brian walked over to Michael while Ben went over to deal with his and Michael’s son.

“Mikey, it’s great to see you here. But...do you know how to play basketball?”

“Of course I do, Brian. We went to the same high school, learned it there, remember?”

Brian remembered it vividly. And among the most vivid memories were some of a skinny little Mikey Novotny being chosen last for most teams, unless Brian was the captain, Mikey being shoved into lockers and toilets unless Brian were around to stop the bullying, and generally, his smaller, meeker friend having a miserable time of it – unless Brian, his best friend and champion were around.

Brian raised his hand and turned the cap around so that the bill faced front then bent down and kissed him on the cheek.  He turned and called out.

“I pick Mikey for my team.”

Greg smiled faintly, then grinned evilly.  “I pick Ben.”

Damn it, Brian thought. In all fairness, Greg should have taken Justin, just to be fair. Now he’d be stuck with the two worst players...and neither one would pass to the other.

But Justin, seeing the dilemma, loudly announced, “Oh my hand...it’s cramping up...I think I need to sit this game out. Thank God, Michael came! Now you don’t need me to play, Brian. I can go shopping instead.”

“How can you go shopping if your hand hurts?” Michael asked, suspiciously.

“Internet,” Justin answered, pulling his laptop out and hooking it up to his phone. 

“Nerd,” two of the street players pronounced, elbowing Michael, and pointing to the young blond sitting on the stands.  Justin merely flipped them the bird and ignored them. Mikey grinned, happy to be accepted as one of the guys.

“Are we here to play ball or talk?” Some of the other players wanted to know.

“Play ball,” Michael happily told them. “So, is this the first inning?”  His teammates looked at him blankly.

“Score a hat trick for me, Michael!” Justin yelled as the play got underway. Emmett snapped a picture of Michael’s answering smile – and Brian’s upturned finger.

***********************************************************

Later that night, as they relaxed in each other’s arms, Michael asked Ben if he minded him crashing the basketball game.

“Mind? I loved it! It reminded me of the time you came after me and crashed that pick-up game I was playing with some guys near my apartment. You stole the ball and wouldn’t give it back unless I agreed to go out with you, remember? They all thought you were crazy...and that convinced me I would be crazy to let you out of my life.”

“I guess I’ve gotten kind of boring lately, caught up in so much of the day to day life of being Mr. Dad, that I forgot to be me, the man who did things like that.”

Ben was quiet for a moment. “I realized today how much I missed that crazy man. It was nice to see him again. Even if he did come for Brian....I liked seeing him.”

Michael looked at his husband in shock. “No! I didn’t come for Brian! I came for you! It was because I thought I was losing you to Brian that...oh no, Ben. I don’t want Brian, not any more. I want his friendship, I will always want that. But I love you and I don’t want you to feel taken for granted. Will you let me try to do better? To wear the husband and lover hats as well as the daddy hat?”

“That’s a hat trick I can appreciate,” Ben murmured, drawing him close again.

 ***********************************************************

Meanwhile, across town, another couple was wrapped in each other’s arms.

Brian leaned over Justin, knees pressed tightly against his waist, hands pinning his wrists above his head. He leaned close to whisper in his ear. “You owe me for your perfidy...you do know why my team lost at basketball today, don’t you?”

“Because...you didn’t have as many points as the other team?” Justin looked up innocently, his blue eyes wide, his tongue lightly moistening his lips. All he had on was his white linen shirt from earlier in the evening when they’d gone out dancing.  His dress pants had been discarded somewhere on the way to the bedroom.  The black fedora with which he’d completed his ensemble now rested atop his lover’s head...and that was the only thing Brian wore. It was a good look for him, Justin thought, looking appreciatively at him in the dim light of their bedroom.

“No...that is the result, but not the cause. Try again?”

“Hmmm, hard to think when...I’m so hard....” Justin shifted slightly, causing his rigid cock to brush against Brian’s thigh.

“That is a problem. One which I’ll remedy once you pay me back...but first you must acknowledge your fault.”

“And then what?” Justin looked up mischievously.

“And then Daddy is going to have to spank his..bad...little...Sonnyboy....”

“I do like it when you wear the Daddy Hat,” Justin murmured as he was rolled over for his...punishment.

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